disappointment/disappointed (a pome, by brettfish)

where are you now?

you, who promised you’d never leave and never forsake

you, who stood to your feet and declared

with both your body and mouth

that you were in this thing for keeps

till death do us part?

where are you now?

you, who fought against the older generation

so that you could be guaranteed your voice

so that you could play your music

on your instruments

in the process chasing some of them away

where are you now?

now that many of them are long gone

some of them dead

never to be argued with or fought with any more

now that you got your way

just exactly where are you?

you who signed up for almost every thing

who joined ever group

went on each and every single missions trip

helped out with setup and breakdown for every single event

for a time anyways.

we could sure use that passion now

we could certainly use some of that commitment

it would be incredible if some of you would suddenly walk right back through that door again…

where are you now?

did you get tired?

did you find it all a little too boring?

was it a failure to entertain?

DID WE NOT ENTERTAIN?

 

where are you now?

did someone manage to talk you out of that lifetime commitment you made?

was it one of your professors who maybe convinced you it was all a bunch of made-up stories?

did you become too cool to believe in any of it any more?

was it no longer convenient for you perhaps?

too comfortable?

of maybe not comfortable enough.

or was it maybe that you outgrew this stuff?

that you just got a little busy?

that life just happened or something?

that you settled?

gave up, gave in, threw in the towel, walked away

packed it away, packed it in, packed it off, over there, to the side, out of harm’s way

out of your way?

was it any of this?

i was sorry to see you go.

i am sad that you never made it back.

i can’t say I’m not a little disappointed. a little sad.

it is not the same without you, you know.

you are missed.

by me.

and by Him.

Has your flesh become Word?

If you haven’t yet read the story of Nigel and Trish and their five children who moved into Hillbrow in South Africa to do life, then you are one of the few. That story has been blowing up on my blog with over 2000 views [that’s ‘blowing up’ on my blog] and 350 Facebook shares.

People are resonating with the story. There is something about it that just reaches out and grabs you [and i imagine makes a lot of people uneasy or nervous in a kind of wait-a-minute-do-i-need-to-now-go-do-that kind of way].

I want to suggest that it is the idea of incarnation. 

One dictionary definition i looked up for incarnation described it as ‘the action of incarnating’ which was not so helpful. Another said it was ‘the bodily manifestation of a spiritual being’ which at least starts to give us something to work with.

It has been given as a description of what Jesus did which is well described in Philippians 2:

3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

6 Who, being in very nature God,
    did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
7 rather, he made himself nothing
    by taking the very nature of a servant,
    being made in human likeness.
8 And being found in appearance as a man,
    he humbled himself
    by becoming obedient to death—
        even death on a cross!

Basically, God, in the form and person of Jesus, came close.

After years of sending messengers is the form of leaders and angels and prophets, God took a step further and came to deliver the message and demonstrate the way to live Himself. He came and lived it amongst us. And forever took away our ability to say, ‘God doesn’t understand. He doesn’t know what I’m going through.’ Well yes He does, because He was here. He gets it.

It’s about not so much looking to your interests as to the interests of others [which Jesus strongly called us to in His ‘Deny yourself, take up your cross daily and follow Me’ speech of Luke 9.23]

Now as followers of Jesus we have the Holy Spirit living in us and so everywhere we go there should theoretically be ‘the bodily manifestation of a spiritual being’ – but the question that needs to be asked on that is how often do we end up looking like us and how often do we end up looking like Jesus?

Here is another story i read about a South African family who look to be at least trying to ‘get’ this to some extent. Although their experiment definitely led to mixed responses from those around them:

‘Some condemned it as a “stupid experiment” and exploitative, calling for them to be “burned in their shack” by locals. Others applauded their courage in bridging South Africa’s massive wealth divide.’

And the same kind of story resonates in this American family, the Albrechts, who have lived in the UK since 1992 and have taken in around 250 homeless people over the last 7 years.

I would say that is one of the strongest lessons we have learnt or observed from our time over here. That moving in to the area ad building relationships with the people around you is one of the most effective ways to really get the chance to share your message [because the loudest sharing of it comes from the day to day of how they see you live life]

It is what resonated with me in my favourite book of all time, ‘No Compromise: The Keith Green story’ where Keith and his wife started taking people into their home within a few months of being married and they ended up on a farm with a community of many people [a lot of whom started out from a place of being down and out]. It wasn’t comfortable or cool or hipster or anything like that. It just felt like the word of God and so they did it.

i love how the word ‘nation’ is present in the word ‘incarnation‘ as well as the word ‘in’

do i think everyone is called to move into a poor, broken-down neighborhood to help bridge the gap between rich and poor and incarnationally make a difference around them? absolutely not. but i do think a lot more people are called to than are presently doing it. i also know that it would be a lot easier if people did it in greater numbers – so groups of friends moving into the same neighborhood [and i would thoroughly encourage the need for some form of relationship to be present before just deciding to move into a rough neighborhood]

i also think this is powerfully linked to the concept of stability – committing to an area, a community, a workplace for a considerable length of time.

maybe the question each of us should be asking is, ‘Why should i not go?’ and then, if there is an answer, stay where you are. there are a growing number of us who believe that poverty will end when the rich meet and get to know the poor. when they move in as neighbors and become some measure of friends.

are you being called? and what scares you about this most? [because i imagine this scares some of you a lot]

in Jesus, the Word became flesh

for most of us the challenge is seeing our flesh become Word…

the parable of the pizza crust

A father had seven children of which two were step-children from his second marriage.

He decided to take them out for a meal and so they went down to the local restaurant. He told his oldest son that he could pick anything off the menu. His son decided to go for a giant steak with a baked potato on the side. He ordered it and they watched him thoroughly enjoy himself wolfing down his meal.

Then the father invited his oldest daughter to do the same and she chose a seafood platter. Again, they all watched as she really enjoyed her food.

This continued down the line until his five children had all eaten. 

Instead of turning to his step-children, the father then turned back to his oldest son and invited him to choose something else off the menu. The son chose a steak kebab this time with a gourmet salad on the side. His daughter went for a three meat pizza. And so it continued down the line.

After the five children had eaten, the father turned to his children and asked them if they wanted dessert. His two step-children were looking a little hungry as well and so he made sure that their water glasses were replenished so that they had something in front of them. He then proceeded to buy ice-cream and cake for his five children. 

As they were about to leave, one of his step-children asked if they too could get something to eat. Moved by compassion the father asked his daughter if it would be okay with her if the two of them shared the bits of pizza crust she had left behind on her plate? She enthusiastically agreed and so everyone left having eaten something. A great night out.

THE IMMORAL OF THE STORY

I mean that would be fine, right? You would have no problem with that if it was an actual story? We would be able to make statements like ‘Well the five are his real children and the two should be glad that they got something, right?’

Or not? Would we be absolutely disgusted that five of the children got to pig out and two were left with the remains of the meal? Would it not be okay that there was enough money and resources to give everyone a good meal and yet the decision was made to give some people a great meal while some had hardly any meal at all? 

I think if this story was an actual situation where you knew the people, it might be a lot different. The reality of the world where rich and poor live very much like this is a lot easier to turn a blind eye to or even celebrate sometimes, perhaps because the situation of the poor seems so metaphorical [until we actually start to meet them and they become ‘real people’] that it isn’t actually real [as long as we can keep them out of sight, right?]

‘The world has enough for everyone’s need, but not enough for everyone’s greed.’ [Gandhi]

I can’t do anything personally about sports and movie stars ludicrous salaries. But maybe I can start with my own greed. And that of those who I am in close relationship with. Through conversation [it’s not guilt that is going to win this battle, but imaginative creativity might get us places] and wrestling over these things. Mutual accountability. Goal setting and experimentation. Living better.

For people in America in particular, one way of starting to align yourselves to something better might be joining a Common Change group and, together with a group of friends, start meeting some of the needs in the lives of the people you know.

For others of us it might be taking on board the stories of people around us who are doing inspirational and creative things like the Albrecht family in the UK, or Nigel and Trish and their family in Hillbrow, South Africa and asking how that might look for us in our context. For parents of young children, it might be reading some of these stories and seeing if there is anything in there we might be able to take on or whether they inspire us to figure out how our story might look.

It might require us taking a moment to stop and do a stock take of our lives and ask if we are currently living out the values that we profess to have or should we be taking a leaf out of Calvin and Hobbes creator Bill Watterson’s book and simply walking away from the place we currently find ourselves to have landed and being more intentional about choosing the place where we decide to set up camp.

Maybe a small part of not feeling overwhelmed by what is happening in Syria right now could be by being intentional about the things I have the ability to change in my life and context right now?

I mean it’s just step-kids right? They’re not even his real children… 

How to raise your children as world changers: Meet Nigel and Trish Branken and their family

I have already shared an article on my blog about Nigel and Trish before and how they moved into what is known as one of the most dangerous neighborhoods with their family and how some of that has played out. Val and i managed to have a Skype call with Nigel a few weeks ago and it was truly inspiring hearing some of the story of how they got to where they are and how it has been playing out. Nigel takes some time here to share about some of the ways in which their decisions and actions have influenced their children in growing up as World Changers…

Nigel,Trish,Hannah,Rachel,Jordan,Daniel,Sarah

Reflections on parenting: Choosing to put God first

When my wife and I moved into Hillbrow, Johannesburg over a year and a half ago, the main concern expressed by many of our loving friends was for our children. People literally asked questions like “What if one of them is kidnapped, raped or murdered?”. Hillbrow is just one of those communities which seem to invoke fear.

We were however convinced that God had spoken to us about moving into the neighbourhood, about downward mobility, and about standing in solidarity with our urban poor neighbours. Trish and I had long discussions about the call of God on our lives, and in fact the potential suffering that following Jesus may cost any believer, and therefore also us. The question we had to answer was whose voice would be louder… the voice of God or the voice of fear.

We searched the Scriptures and were convinced that if Jesus were alive today, He would be spending his life not in comfort and convenience, but rather in places like Hillbrow as friends of prostitutes, drug dealers and the homeless. The more I studied Scriptures, the more I became aware of the dangers of greed, individualism and consumerism.

We drew courage from reframing the question as this: what is more dangerous for our children, given the realities of eternity – to grow up in a society and culture which teaches you to worship the unholy trinity of “me, myself and I” or to be in a potentially physically dangerous place where you can learn the values of Jesus of justice, compassion and love?  Jesus said “What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul? (Matthew 16:26). An important reflection.

We started to dream of a new world, the kind of world we would want to leave to our children.

“We want to see a world in which the rich do not tolerate extreme poverty and inequality. We want to see many people actually laying down their lives of comfort and convenience for the sake of bettering the lives of others. Seeing people freed from poverty, inequality, racism and exploitation is more important than fulfilling our lust for more things! We want to be part of a society in which people are valued more than things. We want to see the god of consumerism in South Africa bowing its knee to a love motivated revolution which results in freedom from oppression and exploitation. We want to see this for all people, regardless of class, citizenship, race or religion. We dream of equality in every sector of society. We believe that if the education system is not OK for a rich kid, it is not OK for a poor kid. The same goes with healthcare, housing, security. The same goes for rural kids and inner city kids. The same for black kids and white kids. We are not more valuable than the least valued in our society. We are doing our lives in a new way. We are going to live our dream and see this reality briefly described above happening around us. We hope others will join us and this will happen around them too. Who knows, very soon, the world can be a different place!”

As we weighed up God’s Word, His call and his promises, we finally came to the decision to move regardless of the cost. As a side reflection, I have subsequently found that the time God gives you grace to do something often coincides with the moment of your decision to obey His Word to you. Grace comes through faith and faith comes from putting the Word of God into practice in your life.

So fast forward a few years from when we made this decision, and here we are living in what many describe as one of the most dangerous neighbourhoods in the world. As responsible parents, we do all we can to protect our children. They know the rules and the risks and we are always close by to protect them. What we have found is that rather than restrictions, we are now in the most spacious place in our lives and the move has in my opinion been the best thing we could have done for our children. So often we think doing radical things for Jesus will harm our children, when in fact the opposite happens – they grow and develop.

I am so often overwhelmed by the things my children do in response to the poverty they now see in the lives of their friends who they love. My son Jordan, aged 8, has spent very little of his pocket money on himself since we have lived here. A little while after we moved in he came to me with his savings and said “Dad, you give me everything I need, I don’t need this money, who do you think we should give it to?” Needless to say my chest swelled as I held back tears of gratitude at the work God was doing in my boy’s heart. He has since done this again and again. His little brother, Daniel, aged 6, also loves to give his pocket money away or to buy food for the homeless with it.

In our block of flats, one of our children’s friends is a little boy named Sipho. Sipho lives with his 4 year old brother, Thabo, and his two year old baby sister, Princess, (not their real names)and single mother in a single room that they sub-let as a family. The room is barely big enough to fit the double bed which they all share. His father is legally not allowed to see him after he tried about 2 years ago to poison the two little boys and himself in an attempted family suicide. Their mom works at night and so the boys are often chased out the flat during the day so she can sleep. They are often hungry and so our two older girls love making them food. Sipho recently turned 8 years old. It was obvious that his mom was not going to throw him a birthday party or buy him any presents. Enter my children! All by themselves they conspired to bless this boy with a birthday party. They all pooled their pocked money together. Hannah, our 12 year old and Rachel, our 10 year old baked the cake. Jordan bought the presents. It was an amazing event. Through these and other similar stories I have become convinced that you cannot teach your children how to love and show compassion through  your words, you have to demonstrate it as a parent and create opportunities for them to take the initiative. Living among the urban poor and standing in solidarity with our neighbours constantly presents opportunities for acts of love.

I have so many more stories to tell, like how Hannah, our 12 year old has become a real advocate for the rights of the oppressed. Our children have had opportunities to speak on radio and television and to many journalists about how society should be helping their friends. Hannah often comes to me and asks me to help a friend get back into school or to get some form of assistance for someone, whether adult or child. We have often involved friends who are lawyers to help her friends and have even taken cases to the Constitutional Court (South Africa’s highest court) on behalf of Hannah’s friends. God is not only doing a work in their hearts, He is giving them a voice to the world.

Moving into Hillbrow has been the best thing we could have done for our children. When we put God first in our lives, He takes care of all the details of our lives. He really does love us and wants the best for us and we can trust Him with our children as we pursue Him and His call with all of our lives. We should never let our children set the agenda in our lives, as precious as they are. We believe they are more precious to God than to us and that He will work in their hearts and do things in them we could not even dream of if we allow Him to really be on the throne of our lives completely.

So in conclusion, let me quote Jesus who said, “Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” We have found this verse to be true in our new life and Hillbrow and know that Jesus can be trusted!

To follow their story a little more closely, check out www.transforming.org.za or connect with Nigel on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/nigel.branken

[For the next inspiring story, with a similiar flavour, in this series on raising world changers, read this one on Lara Harler Lahr and family in Philly]

Caught in the Webb: the truth about Darkwing

Derek Webb is back with a brand new album titled, ‘I was wrong, I’m sorry & I love you.’

And you should get it! Let’s get that spoiler out of the way right now. This is a piece of music, of poetry, of soul scratching that you want in your personal collection.

I have not followed Derek Webb’s career closely enough to give you a fully in-depth review of how this album fits alongside previous albums and into the road he has walked. f you are wanting a deeper connected review that dives headfirst into each track and really gives you a great glimpse into how this offering plays into Derek’s musical journey then you can find three really solid reviews at Geek goes Rogue, World of Chaos and Savoring the Sound.

What i can say is that i’m sitting in the corner of a Starbucks trying to piece together a review of this album and listening to it as i do and i have just been hit by a wave of emotion. The songs are that powerful. Great as simply good music to listen to. Great as a punch in the face once you start listening to the words and letting it bring conviction and challenge and inspiration to chase more closely after God.

I was fortunate to be part of a launch team and so got to hear the songs about a month before the album was released and was privy to some online conversations with Derek hearing his heart behind the record, where he stands personally in his relationship to God and the church and all i can do is echo Renée Zellweger in Jerry Maguire with, ‘Shut up. You had me at hello!’

I loved Derek’s first solo album ‘She shall and must go free’ which i received for free via Noisetrade [which supplies the majority of my music] which Derek happens to also be one of the co-founders of. And then somehow i missed everything that followed [shame on me! i have a lot of catching up to do!] until i heard that a new album was heading this way and managed to crack the nod into the privileged group of those who got an early listen to the album and viewing of the videos he has been pushing out weekly as the release date has approached…

…and so really just get it – the other reviews will tell you the depth of the why but i am more interested in the who…

And I’ve been joking about this for a little while now, but it’s time to take a closer look – Derek Webb has the initials D.W. and Darkwing Duck is known as the cartoon world’s D.W.

As i browsed the internetweb for some Darkwing Duck info I came across this line from the show:

‘I am the terror that flaps in the night, I am the fingernail that scrapes the blackboard of your soul.’ [Darkwing Duck’]

While that is clearly an overinflated opinion that DW held for himself it does sound a lot more like the mantle Derek Webb has [unwillingly at times, i’m sure] assumed on himself, not so much in terms of ‘the terror’ part, but the scraping fingernail that scratches the edge of your conscience and that of the church..

Then i found these:

I grew up as ‘that guy’ in my church and some of the other christian organisations i was a part of, and so i feel like i get some extent of what Derek’s journey must have been like [i imagine ‘alienated’ and ‘lonely’ and ‘God, really? This?’ were some of the sentiments he felt or expressed along the way].

Proverbs 27.6 states that ‘Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses’ and while much of the church was sitting back and choosing comfortability over Truth, Derek got to be one of the voices that called them, painfully at times, back to what they were meant to be.

I imagine, like me, Derek got it wrong at times – a song, and album, with the title ‘I was wrong, I’m sorry & I love you’ indicates at least some measure of that. But from what I know of him, he seems to be someone who has vigorously chased what he believed to be right and spoken up and out, even when it didn’t end up being that comfortable for him. One day Derek will stand before God in judgement and that’s where it will all come out. But more than most perhaps, he has unfairly had to stand before so many others in judgement already, even at those times when his heart and his motives were pure.

So i carried on reading more Darkwing and kept being brought back to images of the other DW:

 I am the terror that flaps in the night, I am a special news bulletin that interrupts your favorite show.

I am the terror that flaps in the night, I am the auditor that wants to look at your books.

 I am the terror that flaps in the night, I am the itch you cannot reach.

And with this album, Derek continues to do what he has always done, with a major twist being that this time the mirror is aimed firmly at himself, but inviting us all along on a journey that most of us will needing to take as well.

When the church loses sight of Truth and Justice and even Honesty and Love, then it needs someone to call it back. The prophets did that in the Old Testament. Jesus and the disciples and Paul continued to do so in the New Testament. And modern day prophetic voices are raised to continue directing us back to the fact that this thing is about God and His kingdom.

Darkwing Duck’s theme song itself echoes some sentiments that might have been expressed about Derek:

Daring duck of mystery,
Champion of right,
Swoops out of the shadows,
Darkwing owns the night.
Somewhere some villain schemes,
But his number’s up.

Cloud of smoke and he appears,
Master of surprise.
Who’s that cunning mind behind
That shadowy disguise?
Nobody knows for sure,
But bad guys are out of luck.

The main difference perhaps is that in our case the ‘villians’ and the ‘bad guys’ are actually simply those in the church who may be heading down the wrong roads, not necessarily out of malice or any kind of evil, but sometimes just out of misdirected motives or skewed vision. In those times the church needs someone to jump out of the shadows and be able to once again help get things back on to the right path. Thank you Derek for being that ‘hero’.

So are Derek Webb and Darkwing Duck actually all that different? In fact, the question we are left with is are they different at all? If you’re still not convinced then I draw your attention to Exhibit B:

With Derek Webb, no matter what direction his music takes, he never seems to choose the easy or comfortable route. He always seems to push forward with his own personal war-cry of ‘Let’s get dangerous!’

In conclusion, if you had to ask me to pick a favourite song of this album, I really can’t. I choose ‘Eye of the Hurricane’ for a moment and then listen some more and suddenly ‘Closer than you think’ takes over and then i switch back to ‘I was wrong, I’m sorry & I love you’ which was the first one i heard and which impacted me strongly… But then ‘Heavy’ is suddenly my favourite song and it starts all over again. There is no best song on this album. Just a collection of really amazing songs that will move you and tug at your heart strings and cause you to rethink stuff and hopefully move you closer to God, and to the church.

I will leave you with Darkwing’s rendition of three lines that I, and the church, and probably you, need to learn to say a lot more often:

I was wrong.

I’m sorry.

I love you.

 

Do yourself a favour. You don’t want to miss this one.

Invent your own life’s meaning [a Calvin and Hobbes inspired life lesson]

I am a big fan of Calvin and Hobbes!

…or i used to be before the creator Bill Watterson gave it all up and went into hiding… or something like that.

Like all really great cartoonists before him, such as Gary Larsen from ‘The Far Side’, Scott Adams of ‘Dilbert’ fame and ‘Pearls before Swine’ creator Stephan Pastis and off course such classic cartoonists such as Charles M Schulz who created Charlie Brown, Snoopy and the rest of the ‘Peanuts’ gang and others, Bill managed to have a complete grasp of funny while at the same time interjecting it with a serious view or commentary of life. All the greats were able to combine the two. Take you from a moment of complete laughter to ‘Wait one minute’ – Boom! Right between the eyes.

It was no huge surprise then when i stumbled across this brilliant cartoon strip that was done as a homage to Watterson using a quote taken from a graduation speech Watterson gave at his alma mater, Kenyon College, in 1990, which began with the words: ‘Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your souls is a rare achievement’

The reason the words jumped out at me is that recently our friend, Mark Scandrette, released a new book called ‘Free: Spending your Time and Money on what Matters Most’ and we are having a book launch party on the 19th September in the Lake Merritt area [which if you’re close enough to attend, you should totally come to]

This homage cartoon finishes with the line ‘To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy… but it’s still allowed… and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.’

As a follower of Jesus, the line of ‘inventing your own life’s meaning’ takes on a bit of a different context, as my pursuit in life is to follow Jesus and see His kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven [a place where Love God, Love people and look after the least of these does not sound like the worst life’s meaning to have] but the line, ‘Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul’ completely resonates as I see far too many people who call themselves ‘christian’ yet are clearly not living the free and abundance-filled life that Jesus clearly calls us towards.

Take a look at the rest of the homage cartoon and read the post below to see just how Bill Watterson was able to achieve that. The one useless fact I know about him is that no Calvin and Hobbes merchandise is ever legal as he intentionally held the rights to those so that he could maintain control and care of his characters. This post takes you into a little bit deeper of the why.

Would you say that your life reflects your values and satisfies your soul right now? And if not, what are you prepared to do about it..?

Mark, my words: Unless you become like a child…

The difference between child-ish and child-like is immense. One deals with never having really grown up and matured and the other deals with holding on to qualities that make being a child to incredible – things like trust and innocence and honesty and genuine belief and excitement and a whole lot more.

Let’s take a look at Jesus’ words on the topic of the importance of meeting Him with some kind of childlikeness to be able to fully appreciate and experience the kingdom of God in the way that it was intended:

 

[For the next passage looking at the interaction between Jesus and the Rich Young Ruler, click here]