so i read this article in the restaurant this morning while waiting for my buddy to arrive.

firstly it was set in miami

secondly the premise of it is completely hilarious slash disturbing as in this line: ‘burglars snorted remains of a man and two dogs in the mistaken belief that they had stolen illegal drugs’

thirdly, that’s not the best part

fourthly it goes on ‘once they realised their error the suspects discussed returning the remaining ashes, but threw them in a lake instead because they thought their fingerprints were on the containers’

and the clincher for me was this: ‘police divers were tring to recover the ashes’

like really? the way the article (Cape Times newspaper, 21 Jan for reference) is written – they were going to return the ashes then threw them (the ashes) into a lake and now police divers are trying to retrieve them. with what? underwater goggle microscopes and a pair of tweezers? in hindsight i guess what would make more sense is if the divers are swimming in the lake looking for the urn, but without that realisation the whole thing seems a lot more gary larsen or jack handey and qualifies for shtupidt people 101 – heeeeere’s your sign…