Tag Archive: weird


Latest challenge on WordPress: Many of us think of our lives as boringly normal, while others live the high life. Take a step back, and take a look at your life as an outsider might. Now, tell us at least six unique, exciting, or just plain odd things about yourself.

# i like to drink Top Deck chocolate from the bag – second best option is breaking chunks into smaller pieces and microwaving, but a far higher and i honestly believe tastier method is to leave the slab on the dashboard of your car in the sun or on a window sill til it melts and then make a hole in one end and drink to your heart’s content – INCREDIBLE!

# i like to bend the english language to my will as i posted about here. i spell some words differently on purpose like ‘thankx’ and ‘thort’ and use a minimum of capitalisation and promote some nouns into adjectives which i promote to verbs which i promote to nouns and so on. i think i came up with the saying ‘vibing a vibe.’

# as a hobby i occasionally put together short video clips for a made up you tube show titled ‘Dangerous Things You Can Least Expect’ – while the majority of people who watch them seem to think they’re pretty funny, they have not come close to going viral yet and sit more hesitantly at a spot i would assume they call ‘virus’ rather. my favourite one at the moment is probably the latest one i did on sax and violins but i guess other people didn’t think so as much cos at the time of going to press it has only had around 218 views.

# i have a yellow and white stuffed dolphin called ‘No_bob’ [i was going to call him ‘Bob’ but he doesn’t] – in many places around South Africa he is more famous than me – i used to feature quite prominently on the local Christian speaking circuit for youth groups and on two occasions i was introduced and about ten people clapped and as i started speaking i introduced No_bob and when i took him out of my pocket a good third of the room [few hundred people] started cheering. people try to convince me that No_bob used to be blue but he wasn’t. people will probably swear he was but i have pictures from the time when i won him on the pier a Brighton. a Cape Town Christian punk band called Serving Suggestion performed ‘the No_bob song’ and it became one of their most popular songs…

# i hate raisins with a passion – no i mean REALLY, not just like you pretend not to like them but you will eat them only by themselves, or only in things. i mean i started the ‘i hate raisins’ group on facebook, i once went with a friend to a park at night and burnt a bag of them just to do the world a favour. i have recorded two songs so far titled ‘the Squishy Fruit Conspiracy’ and ‘Sultanas’ which was a parody of the old Snow ‘Informer’ song…

# the word is traffic circle. if you enter at one point and leave before doing a full 360 degrees then what you have taken part in is called a traffic semi-circle or a half-moon or something. if you are going to insist on calling it a ‘traffic circle’ then like me you must go THE WHOLE WAY ROUND and usually not just once cos you have to make sure… three or four times is fun with first timers while the record with a full combi and trailer at the big Free State circle is i think 13 times with petrol attendants standing cheering at the side of the road and overall it is the 53 we did in Stellenbosch after cell group one nite. like a record playing, right round round round.

honourable mentions must go to biting people [which i used to do the first time i met people as a sign of affection, but the older it gets the creepier it gets so i’ve largely stopped] and cycling the 109km Argus cycle tour in either pink tights or fish net stockings [best way to keep yourself cycling when going up Suikerbossie – no ways i’m getting off in front of those crowds wearing pink tights!]

just a regular normal guy, really.

so from time to time i have started googling the phrase “fun silly pictures of strange weird” just because it seemed like the right thing to do to give a bit of the different flavour to Irresistibly Fish and so far it has done that…

first there was ‘obey this sign’ sign and smoking chicken fish
and then there was bacon cat and toilet mug

and what does week three hold? well take a look at some of these:

It’s a cushion but it’s also a lap. Kinda.

Weave the silk, you must!

Then for the green and eco-friendly minded we have the pea car. And for the artistically inclined it’s Fish in Boat:

and lastly, in a section i like to call ‘HUH?’

The question is… which flavour will you pick?

Okay so a scarf… that is boobs… because… um… cheque for table 7 please!

they move among us.

little girls wearing pink dresses and matching pink bonnets who move around among us undetected.

innocent-looking. some might say cute. i don’t. but some might.

always holding firmly on to the hand of a surrogate adult life-form clone creating the appearance of normalcy in their day-to-day meanderings as they move around from place to place always staring, subtly taking in information from their surrounding surroundings.

occasionally, when data collecting has been of a particularly slow and pedestrian nature, they might concede permission to a greyscale miniature suited male child monitor unit to tag along for the precise purpose of adjectival and accumulatory preposition enhancement, you know, to speed things along.

and so they continue, day by day, to move. among us.

they must be stopped!

and they can be.

or at least they could be if the power lay with them.

if they really were just innocent little girls wearing pink dresses and matching pink bonnets.

but everyone knows the power lies in the box. the hamster type creature [a very inaccurate description but for lack of a better one, “hamster type creature” is going to have to do] that lives in the box. and directs proceedings.

proceedings involving little girls wearing pink dresses with matching pink bonnets attached at the hand to surrogate adult life-form clones and occasionally tolerating the necessity of the greyscale miniature suited male child monitor unit [adjectival and accumulatory preposition enhancement]

it seems all too hopeless.

and it is.

you should go.

now.

sh!

the other day, for fun, i googled the phrase “fun silly pictures of strange weird” and came up with this strange assortment of pics… it felt like time for a revisit to the strange wonderfulness and weirdosity that exists in the google image page of that residence and so here are some more that are fun or silly or really quite strangeweird [it’s a word!]:

For those to whom the complexity of the attaching of the modern day bicycle helmet to the head feels a little overwhelming

Sometimes there are no words. But there is comfort. Or possibly fear.

So we start off with some helpful instruction and a weird kind of pink thing…
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Imagine the size of the one your cat would have to wear.

Forget Spider-Pig, here is Baconcat… a cat with the body of a… um… bacon?

Then there are these two which are, well, um yes…
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You know when you really got to go, but you walk into your friend’s bathroom and…

When I’m done with this cup I don’t think I’ll be asking for a number two.

And the last two are just… well… i don’t know which one is worse…

i felt like creating a fun little blog today but didn’t really have any ideas so i googled “fun silly pictures of strange weird” [as one does] and hit images and came up with these three signs:

which i thort were all fairly funny…

and of course fish in chicken body smoking…

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so all in all, some true examples of fun silly pictures of strange weird…

for they will be seen as human!

i’m not sure why i was thinking about this today but i was driving back from dropping off our recycling (oh wait, it just hit me, never mind) and this thort came in to my head – i wish that i knew how to relate to handicapped people better

when i was a little kid my folks used to take me to this place called the Avril Elizabeth home once a week where they would sing some songs and maybe do a talk for a whole bunch of kids with various handicaps (or whatever the politically correct word for handicaps is these days but, you know) from physical to mental and i would love to say that those visits paved the way for me to grow up as an adjusted young man, able to connect with, understand and love those people, but it didn’t

it freaked me out. a lot. and thinking back i think it was purely because the whole thing was not explained to me. i think my parents were incredible for going week after week and really just trying to share God’s love with a bunch of people that for the most part the world has rejected, ignored or forgotten (or at the very least, snuck quietly into the corner) but i think it would have made a complete difference if they had sat me down at home and explained the whole thing – i think the assumption was that exposure would be enuff (and i think for a lot of people it is) but for some reason it just didn’t click with me and so i saw them as freaks, as weird, as… let’s be honest here… retards…

and i REALLY wish it had been different… but now i stand (well sit) behind my keyboard (yup, definitely sitting, otherwise my neck would be messed from all that downward stretching) and i am sorry it didn’t work out differently – because i still struggle to feel comfortable around those who are physically/mentally different to me in such an extreme way and i want to be able to shed all those child-enforced-and-learnt responses and just be amazing with them

the one thing i do remember is the nurses, who were amazing with the kids – and the majority of them i recall – if not all of them – were black nurses and this was mid 1980’s – and just remember seeing such love and acceptance and complete utter treatment of them as humans… and not lesser humans, and certainly not retards – maybe apartheid could have been ‘pulled’ a whole lot earlier if a bunch of stupid white leadery people had had the chance to sit and observe those nurses for an hour a week…

my friend nancy the twin (and her sister mary the twin) who recently got married to dreadlock mike (Zanzibar, it is!) has a brother called Simon who is different in some way and he was in top form at the wedding and an absolute pleasure to watch – he was sitted right next to the podium where the speeches happened and any time someone got going on a speech he would start clapping and it made me think of the Oscars, when someone is talking too long and the music starts to play – come on Simon, it’s your cue, send them awaaaayyyy…

and i think i’m getting better, cos i didn’t run and hide every time Simon was near, which was a lot cos i think he digs me and was following me and staring me down a lot, and i really enjoy him, altho still feel awkward and weird and like i don’t get it a lot of the time…

but he is not a retard! he is the brother of two good friends of mine. and that makes him my friend.

if he’ll have me…

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