Taboo Topics: Race – What I would love my white friends to hear

i don’t know if this is the right place to begin this conversation on race, but it is a place and so will hopefully get the ball rolling and then we can see where it goes from there.

i think we would be foolish to believe that this conversation will be easy or comfortable all the way through – i am hoping we will be able to get to a place where people can be really honest [maybe in a raw and rough and edgy in-your-face kind of way] even if it does not feel good to hear and i am desperately hoping that we will really make an effort to listen. much grace and love and forgiveness and patience is going to be needed and i believe i know some really quality people who will be able to bring all of that to the table.

the place i have chosen to start this conversation [well, this is my second go at this, my first attempt a few months ago was an epic fail and so hopefully this question will go down better] is by asking the question to my friends who are not white, ‘What would you like your white friends to know/hear/be aware of?’ and i am hoping that a number of you will email me at brettfish@hotmail.com if you have something to say on this…

Sarona Reddy shares one Indian woman’s perspective on some aspects of race

Tsholofelo Mpuru speaks into the issue of white privilege and more

Mhlengi Mpungose shares one black man’s perspective on some of the fears and prejudices black people face

Hulisani Khorombi’s shares some of her story and specifically her take on the term ‘Coconut’

 Siki Dlanga speaks about the idea of ‘the better black’ 

Tshego Motiang shares some incredible insights about the need for open communication

Tasha Melissa Govender speaks about Indian accents and why you shouldn’t ask her to cook you some spicy food and more

Juliet Paulse talks about having her own racism exposed and pursuing deeper relationships with white people

I….AM…..CYN-THI-A!!!

[to the tune of ‘I am Spartacus’ and yes it’s okay that most of you don’t know who that is but let google be your friend – ignorance away!]

so this last week tbV and mself had been invited to speak at the national Scripture Union staff conference held at Rocklands campsite in Simonstown. as we interacted with them on the first night and during the next day this one lady stood far out from the general crowd

and yes, her name was Cynthia, well done Holmes!

Cynthia is an elderlyish lady type person – if you go by years – and small of stature but absolutely ginormous of heart – she was one of the youngest people on camp and so the next morning session i wanted to honour her and so i said something along the lines of, “Cynthia, you are slightly older than a lot of the people here and i don’t want to ask your age but…” “I’M
66!!!” she shouts out…  priceless

so at 66 this lady was really one of the youngest people there and i said a few things about that like i know people who are 23 years of age who are incredibly old and yet i know her – and this other lady Rita Reed at my last church congregation – who in years appear to be old, but in heart and character and action are completely young and vibrant and living and completely modelling what Jesus called us to when He spoke of “life to the full” in John 10.10

i think people die pretty soon after realising they are old – but when i grow up – and it’s bound to happen sooner or later – i want to be as young as Cynthia. She competed in a hardcore arduous Amazing Race they ran which was not for the faint hearted and where one of the 9 teams pulled out completely to go to a coffee shop and a few individuals from other teams gave up, Cynthia and her team finished in third place.

for me age is just a number you can work out by looking at your birth certificate or id – how old you are is how you choose to live life – do you embrace it or do you try to survive it?

Be pro-life. Start with yourself! Live! Breathe! Embrace! Jump! Dare!

[as an aside i want to brag about the beautiful Val who had to endure a meal of scrambled eggs – which she is not the biggest fan of – and snails – which made her puke and yet continued to finish the race in the freezing cold with her team, while a bunch of ‘old people’ had given up and were drinking coffee!]

the irrelevance of standing under a chocolate.

i don’t understand chocolate – i know something about cocoa beans but that’s about it – possibly a glass and a half of milk in certain brands and a handful of raiSINs in other overly disobedient and retarded versions – and a bunch about it liking to stick around and be an accessory to your body long after the eating date (friends with unbenefits?) and also that when it goes white it is old (if it starts out white it is probably not as nice as any other form and so you’re in trouble already) um, and that the best possible melting mix in my travels is the following:

[serves two]

one slab of top deck (or more or bigger depending on how many people)

one or two bags of smartie eggs

a microwave, a microwave-friendly plate and two teaspoons (or more if more)

break the Top Deck into individual pieces and then break those in half – microwave for between 30 and 70 seconds (depending on your microwaver) – open, stir, microwave some more until the hint of meltage – the add smartie eggs – the microwave another 30 to 70 seconds then open stir and continue until melted

eat with teaspoons (while watching Survivor or in extreme cases, Amazing Race)

amazing! the chocolate, not the race although it is highly entertaining, especially when chocolate is involved in the challenges as it was that one time.

but give me a bag of cocoa beans, a great big…. tract of land, a shovel and a glass and a half of milk and i will have no clue – throw in a conveyor belt and a packaging machine and will i not still be useless?

[the answer is yes, yes i will]

so i don’t understand chocolate – i ‘get’ some of the concept behind it, i know how it affects me and adds to my life – but i completely love it (well maybe not ‘completely’ – definitely not more than the beautiful Valerie and probably only equal to a good gravy-covered pea-and-sausage-accompanied mash potato portion) and make the most of it (and occasionally embrace it when no-one is looking)

i love chocolate.

so what are you saying, brett fish?

well, i think it’s completely obvious what i am getting at but let me lead you there on the off chance that your mind is not as lateral thinking as mine own.

i love God!