Saying “No” to good things.

i just emailed someone to excuse myself from a creative planning dreaming meeting on Wednesday.

i imagine it is going to be an amazing meeting. i believe i would have gotten a lot out of it and also hopefully been able to put a lot into it.

But i realised on the weekend, that i don’t have the capacity for that meeting

My Strength Weakness continued: Meet Tim Tucker [Multi-tasking]

a year or so ago, i asked a bunch of my friends to write a piece on the topic of ‘My Strength Weakness’ – sharing a little about something in their lives that is viewed as a strength, but which in some cases can also turn about to be a weakness. And these great posts were the result. It was so helpful that i figured it was time to do it again, with a whole different bunch of people, and so here is ‘My Strength Weakness continued’ and we start off with my friend Tim Tucker:

I’m a multi-tasker.

I don’t mean the kind of multi-tasker that can watch TV, have a cup of tea and hold a conversation at the same time. I mean that I thrive on juggling multiple projects simultaneously and love to test how far my capacity can reach.

Often it feels like spinning numerous plates… and having to judge which plates are wobbling and need a bit of attention… and which have enough momentum just to keep on spinning. Maybe this sounds stressful – but I love the challenge.

This becomes a massive weakness though when I accept projects that God has not assigned me to do. On one occasion I received a phone call. I’d said no a few times to a particular position that I was being asked to fill. But an influential person called me and said, “Tim – you are the only person who has the capacity to do this.” They played to my ego with that flattery… and I said “yes”.

You see – multi-taskers can feel invincible and often have a superman complex. The problem is, when there are too many plates starting to wobble… and some start to teeter on the edge – then fall and smash, it can be a pretty spectacular disaster.

Unfortunately this happened as a result of me saying yes on this occasion… And who suffers when this happens… me, my family – my relationship with God… the organisation I worked for… etc. etc. So there are tonnes of lessons I’ve learned through this. God has had to deal with my superman complex and I’ve had to learn to trust him with the things that seem good ideas – but are not the things He’s asked me to do. I’ve had to learn where the edge of my capacity is… and be careful to not step over that – in fact – build in some breathing space… “mind the gap” as they say on the London tube. And most importantly, I’ve had to learn to listen to those around me who see the warning signs. To be accountable.

And to learn the power and freedom of the word “no”.

[Tim Tucker is a family man with 3 kids… committed to working out his faith within the African context as part of The Message. Tim has developed ‘The Leaders’ Table’ as a way of resourcing and connecting with emerging leaders in Africa… to check it out, click here]

[To read the story of Howard Fyvie and his Strength Weakness which is confidence, click here]