Friday Fun: Blessed are the sarcastic. Yes, i meant that.

[This is also shared as a special shout out to my Scottish friends/family in light of today’s referendum, however sad or happy you might be]

One of the members of my posse, known as the Four HorseDawgs of the Apocalypse, showed me this just shortly before i left Americaland and it was well funny.

A whole bunch of you would have seen it on my Facebook page already but as we head towards the weekend i thought it would be good to share some fun with those who maybe hadn’t.

If you know someone who is sarcastic, you should totally forward this to them:

By a group called Burnistoun…

If you appreciated this sarcasm, you will more than likely become fans of Pearls Before Swine strips which you can check out over here.

Dangerous Things You Can Least Expect: The Collection

hi, my name are Brad Fish and i like to make videos to can have warn you of things you may not have previously been warned about and so i have came up with a series what are called  ‘Dangerous Things You Can Least Expect’ – these are full of the education and should be passed on to your friends and family and even maybe those who are only a little bit of your enemy so that they can have be protected too:

the one that started it all – episode one – PAPER

episode two warns about the dangers of ICE-CREAM

episode three was all about SARCASM, or more correctly sar-chasm!

episode four saw the first request which was ironically ‘REQUESTS’ seen as quite full of danger

episode five, which has been shown in at least three different schools [mostly in Pretoria] and specifically their English classes was on the topic of PUNCTUATION

episode six, another request, and this time on the unseen hazards linked to WOOL

and finally [so far] another two for the English classrooms perhaps, this episode on the CLITCHY or as they say in France, the Cliche’

and ‘THE CLITCHY: PART DEUX’ or ‘REVENGE OF THE CLITCHY’ – first time we have attemped a part too.

An episode of SOMETIMESDLY DANGEROUS THINGS You Can Least Expect covering things that sometimes can be safe and other times can be dangerful.

episode 10 warned us about just some of the many dangers one can find within ART

episode 11 warned us about the inherent dangers associated with PROCRASTINATION, or it would have if i had gotten round to it

episode 12, which was designed for a friend and good fan’s tut class was dedicated to the pretty obvious calamities found within STRESS

episode 13 warned us about BLOCKS with the ever popular danger item of Lego receiving a second look in

episode 14 showed why FRIENDSHIP, surely a never dangerous thing, could indeed be many kinds of dangerful

and then episode 15, maybe a slightly more less expected one, detailed some very ponderous aspects of CAMPING as a dangerous thing which may or may not cause the end of the world today, no tomorrow, no in October!

surprisingly Episode 16 appears to be a DTYCLE about BACON – are there any dangers associated with bacon? how could this be?…

Episode 17 are about BIRTHDAYS – a dangerous thing what can happen to you mostly once a year

Episode 18 were about raiSINS – can’t believe it took me to long to warn people about these – probably cos it are more obvious

Episode 19 were also about raiSINS cos there are so much dangers to warn about these little things of horrible pukeness

Episode 20 were about the US ELECTIONS [with an L] that have taken place while i were over in Americaland

Episode 21 were MY BEST ONE SO FAR and deals with the dangers what can be associated with VIOLiNS [and the need for more SAX]

Episode 22 have deal with FLYING and why it are wright to fear that

Episode 23 have been on CARROT CAKE, another Dangerous Thing You Can Least have expected to eat.

Episode 24 helped explain to us that WHAT THE FOX SAYS might be incredibly Dangerful to us.

Episode 25 took a look at WEDDING TITLES, because you know what trouble those can cause.

Episode 26 informed us that SCOTLAND itself is a Dangerous Thing not to be messed with.

it is the links and comments and shares and likes and commentary that get more people seeing these and sharing them further so thank-you if you have been one of the people doing that and if you haven’t then feel free to start. but ONLY if they make you laugh, giggle, smile or liquid-shoot – if you hate them, you wouldn’t have read down to here.

Dangerous Things You Can Least Expect: The story continues…

once upon a time i developed a bad pseudo afrikaans accent and an idea for a show that would warn people about the inherent dangers lurking behind innocent-seeming things [like paper, ice-cream and screaming “Lego” when someone who is dangling you over a cliff asks what you will give them if they pull you up to safety] and a few people started really enjoying these videos and some people even started sharing them with their friends via the various social networks… there are now 9 of these official videos [and 2 or 3 non official ones that i recorded for english classes, youth groups or new friends because they had a special request – should start charging for these and making T-shirts!] and so in reverse order, here are the Dangerous Things You Can Least Expect videos from the latest one which was:

Episode 10 of DTYCLE speaks about the dangers of procrastination which lurk closeby, especially when you are meant to be doing somethi…

A slightly somewhat longer episode of DTYCLE looking at a few of the aspects related to ART as a Dangerous Thing You Can Least Expect

An episode of Sometimedly Dangerous Things You Can Least Expect covering things that sometimes can be safe and other times can be dangerful.

this two parter episode, which is one for the english classrooms i’m sure, on the Clitchy or as they say in France, the Cliche’

and ‘The Clitchy: part Deux’ or ‘Revenge of the Clitchy’ – first time we have attempted a part too.

episode six, another request, and this time on the unseen hazards linked to Wool

episode five, which has for some reason, known only to South African English teachers, actually been used as an educational tool in a number of schools [mostly in Pretoria] and specifically their English classes was on the topic of Punctuation

episode four saw the first request which was ironically ‘Requests’ seen as to be quite full of danger

episode three was all about sarcasm, or more correctly sar-chasm!

episode two warns about the dangers of Ice-cream

and finally, the one that started it all – episode one – Paper

this thing grows by people liking and commenting on You Tube and liking and sharing on Facebook and tweeting and retweeting on Twitter [and Flickering on Flicka? not sure i’m even sure what that one is] and so thank you to everyone who has done one or more of those or is about to right now…

catflap man, catflap man… he does anything except…

so two nites ago we get a knock on our security complex apartment door at around 9.30pm and so being the nice friendly neighbourly guy i am i go and open it and it’s not nice to call someone a weirdo on first impression so i feel unable to describe to you the person who was outside the door [strange, cos usually an unexpected knock that late at nite at our complex means they’ve pulled another wheel clamping on us but i quickly went through an inventory of our cars and unless she broke into our garage to clamp my car…]

“um hi, i’m from lower die rand [name of our complex – we are upper die rand so kinda a whole different complex – we are kinda in the middle of a row of apartments in the middle of the complex so not your likeliest first apartment door knock you would have thort… but only if you were a sane person] and i’m looking for some help cos i can’t get my cat to go through the cat flap and do you know how to make a cat go through a cat flap?”

wo, really? could this be an encounter with the legendary catflap man?

CATFLAP MAN, CATFLAP MAN
HE CAN DO ANYTHING A CATFLAP-MAN CAN DO
WAIT A SEC, NO HE CAN’T
HE CAN’T EVEN DO THE BASICEST THING ONE WOULD ASSOCIATE WITH A GUY CALLED CAT FLAP MAN
LOOK OUT, HERE COMES NON CATFLAP MAN…

i kid you not. now being friendly neighborhood nice guy type of guy i just think this is a little weird and i look in at val who is sitting on the couch and she is mouthing “No!” and shaking her head vigorously… and so instantly i go from ‘weird guy with cat flap problem’ to ‘hardcore serial killer with a really flimsy back story come to beat us to death with a domestic animal’ and as i peer down (it’s amazing what a rush of paranoia can do) it now seems like he quite possibly could be trying to have stucken his foot a little bit in the doorway ready to jam it in as i try and close it.

a huge war wages (instantly altho it seemed like for minutes with hardcore slow mo jedi-like moves and counter moves and strikes and counter attempts at strikes) between friendly neighborhood guy and wife-injected-paranoia freak…

i managed to kinda strike a balance between the two and so a hurried “i’m not the catflap engineering genius i may have appeared to you to have been upon initial glance” kind of apology and door close finished off the ordeal.

had i been a more neighborly guy you possibly could have found me at 10.30pm on friday nite down in lower die rand trying to help a new friend jam cats through a cat flap using enticement, threatening, subterfuge or sarcasm (who knows with cats? sarcatsm perhaps…)

but it seemed like more of a job for CATFLAP MAN…

so if there’s something strange, and your cat’s no good
who you gonna call? CATFLAP MAN
cos you installed a flap, but Mr Tibbs just stood
who you gonna call? CATFLAP MAN…