Interrupt the Rot

It is 2 days to go til 2015.

In some ways, most ways actually, nothing really changes when the clock hand ticks off that final second. As a South African, i can be assured that Australians, New Zealanders and more have been experiencing 2015 for hours, and that it will be another ten hours after i do before my friends in Oakland, where we lived for more than half of this year, will be arriving at their own 2015.

It’s just another day.

But also it’s not.

Mentally, emotionally, maybe even spiritually, there is a whole lot more going on and it is a great opportunity to seize, like the wriggly diem that it is, with both hands and make the absolute most of it.

i call it a life stock take and the end of a year, beginning of a year, is a great time to do it, because in our minds something changes.

It is the opportunity for a fresh start in many ways.

And i am not talking about New Year’s Lie-o-lutions. Altho in the past, i have called them Evolutions, and come up with some great posts on ideas of things you might want to change or put in place.

Don’t make ‘promises’, make plans.

If you’re married, this can be a great activity to do with your person as they can help keep you accountable. And if you’re not, you may want to suggest a good friend joins you and you do this together.

Set an hour or two aside in the next day or so. Look at some different aspects of your life [can use a different page for each one] – good habits you would like to keep up or strengthen, bad habits you would like to remove, how you spend your time, how you spend your money, who are the voices you invite to speak into your life, who are you mentoring, how is your eating or your exercise, your sport or your play, any addictions that need some attention [from smoking or drinking or gambling to things like World of Warcraft, Golf or sport-watching, how is your relationship with God, are you reading books written by people of a different race or culture or perspective than your own, who do you need to forgive or ask forgiveness from.

And probably 100 more. Those are just some ideas to get you going.

The point is to stop for a bit. To interrupt the norm. To create the space to catch things you don’t want to be part of your day to day. To create the foundation for 2015 to be a most excellent year.

i would LOVE to hear how it goes…

‘It is often said that before you die your life passes before your eyes. It is in fact true. It’s called living.’ [Terry Pratchett]

Mid-year resolutions

well if you know me a little bit, you know i am not a big fan of resolutions [nice-sounding generally-empty promises you make to yourself and keep for a week at the beginning of each year] but i did write a piece on new year’s evolutions once with the idea of putting things into play that will actually change you or your circumstances or community…

and being mid-way through the year is a great time to look back and do a bit of a stock take of the year and see how you are doing, rather than waiting for January 1 to try and get things changed up and different for the future. so how about it? grab a paper and pen and head down to a coffee shop for an hour or find a quiet spot in your house or drive somewhere naturey and give some time to looking back and seeing how you have done this year so far – in relationships, in achievements, in looking after the least of these and whatever else comes to mind.

here are a couple of ideas to get you started:

FORGIVE PEOPLE WHO HAVE HURT YOU – is there someone this year that did something to hurt you? a friendship that was broken? something that felt like a vicious backstab? someone you heard who was saying things about you behind your back? or maybe it was even longer ago than that… something you have been holding on to for a long time and just really need to let go of. my friend Lindsay has written a great blog post on the importance of forgiveness which is worth checking out. Even something that can seem as small as holding on to an offence that has been committed against you can be completely destructive to you and your relationships.

REACH OUT TO AT LEAST ONE PERSON CONSIDERED THE LEAST OF THESE – you definitely do not need to be a Christ follower to be doing this, but it is expected of people who call themselves Christ followers that you will be known by the love you have for each other and also that you will reach out to the least of these [not all of them, but at least start with one] – so is there someone in your life who is poor or broken or marginalised or lonely who you could reach out to in a way that will allow them to experience love and hope and improve their life? not just a handout or a conscience-easer, but a person or family or group of people that you are investing in to journey along with them. someone you could give a name to right now? and if not, now would be a good time to start looking around and asking who that person might be for you – might be a monetary thing but a more likely to be valuable thing would be one that involves time and energy

DO THE SIGNIFICANT PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE KNOW YOU LOVE THEM? i just heard of a friend of mine who recently left his job and this amazing celebration they threw for him in which people shared testimonies of what he meant to them and so on and while it sounded absolutely incredible, it made me think of a funeral – too often we wait til someone is gone or the situation changes or there is an official celebration like a birthday or wedding to let them know how important they are to us. But why wait for that? Maybe write down your ten favourite people in life right now and over the next month or so, find a creative way to let them know that you think they are special and you appreciate them. How about making sure that there is someone on that list you have never told? A parent or teacher, some leader from your present on your past, a mentor or a friend. And how about trying to identify someone in or around your life who you suspect might be lonely and come up with a creative way of celebrating them as a person? [i would love to hear stories of any of these things shared back here so please come and tell us how they went]

those are just three things but i imagine that is a good start and you also already know some of the other stuff in your life that you were hoping or intending to do at the start of this year that somehow got pushed to the side – or else can identify addictions [from substances as ‘innocent’ as coffee or sodas to more damaging ones like alcohol, cigarettes or drugs] or time wasters [television, hobbies, phone, games, music, sport – maybe not bad in themselves but when they start to take over any of them can be] or even so-called ministry stuff that is overwhelming you and causing you to not have enough time for God and people…

take this opportunity – Carp Diem – Fish this day! and make a change so that the second half of 2012 can be even more successful, life-giving and just generally full of good things, moments and people than the first half of it was.

[if this is something you take seriously in any way i would LOVE to hear about it and the changes you might make so feel free to comment here or even send me an email to brettfish@hotmail.com] ongoing life evaluations and changes can be completely life transformational.

new year’s evolutions to consider part vi [laugh, and make others laugh]

another way of evolving or transforming your life towards the better in 2012 is this:

LAUGH, AND MAKE OTHERS LAUGH

i don’t think i know anyone who laughs too much.

i know people who smile A LOT and who seem to be perpetually happy and unphased by life and they are really refreshing to be around. and i’m not talking about people pretending nothing is ever wrong – they still have bad days and hard times and definitely get frustrated on occasion and cry when the situation calls for it… but in the neutral times, they have a joy that just pours out of them and infects those around them. is this you?

there is a distinct difference between happiness and joy and i believe it is this:

# happiness is situation or context dependent – so if i am having a good day i am happy, if i am eating ice-cream i am happy, if i find twenty bucks in the street i am happy, but if i get caught in traffic or i fail an exam or someone misunderstands my intentions then i get sad or depressed or angry.

# whereas joy is a deeper experience that goes beyond feeling and is situation or context irrelevant – so things can be going badly, but aware of who i am and God’s great love for me and all the privilege and advantage i have in life, i am still upbeat and hopeful and often happy as well. so joy can be expressed in happiness, but more often than not would be expressed by a lack of the expected emotion [anger, depression, irritability] when things are not going so well. joy comes as an overflow of a solid foundation on God and His word and promises and truth and is also more likely to be found where there is significant community

there are some people who are always whining, complaining, negative facebook status/twitter’ing – don’t be like them – i challenged a friend of mine on facebook cos we felt that her statuses [stati?] were negative maybe half the time and she responded by unfriending me and i am okay with that [room for one more] but i hope that even by bringing it to light she will be challenged to think about it and hopefully have an ‘aha’ realisation moment that leads to her being more intentionally positive from now on. the thing about being constantly negative or brought down by circumstances is that people eventually stop wanting to hang around with you, which will lead to greater sadness, disappointment depression and so it just feeds itself – but by being intentionally joyfilled we uplift others around us which often leads to us being further uplifted and so it becomes an upward spiral.

so in 2012 find reasons to laugh, to smile, to make others laugh – think carefully about how you speak to people [do you tend to uplift or criticise, mock, joke negatively, bring down] and how you write your stati [statuses?] and tweets and create opportunities that will help others to find happiness and laughter and be built up in their own joy

as the writer says in the psalms, ‘This is the day that the Lord has made – let us rejoice and be glad in it.’ [118.24]

and a great way to be living this out is to make others laugh because it is highly contagious – think of something you can do today to make someone else really happy or give someone a great reason to break out in a raucous laugh…

[oh and one specific way that might help you to laugh is by checking out the brad fish ‘Dangerous Things’ videos if you haven’t like this one on how violins can be so subtly dangerous, and sharing them with your friends]

continue on to the next one about dreaming and helping others live theirs…