the parable of the pizza crust

A father had seven children of which two were step-children from his second marriage.

He decided to take them out for a meal and so they went down to the local restaurant. He told his oldest son that he could pick anything off the menu. His son decided to go for a giant steak with a baked potato on the side. He ordered it and they watched him thoroughly enjoy himself wolfing down his meal.

Then the father invited his oldest daughter to do the same and she chose a seafood platter. Again, they all watched as she really enjoyed her food.

This continued down the line until his five children had all eaten. 

Instead of turning to his step-children, the father then turned back to his oldest son and invited him to choose something else off the menu. The son chose a steak kebab this time with a gourmet salad on the side. His daughter went for a three meat pizza. And so it continued down the line.

After the five children had eaten, the father turned to his children and asked them if they wanted dessert. His two step-children were looking a little hungry as well and so he made sure that their water glasses were replenished so that they had something in front of them. He then proceeded to buy ice-cream and cake for his five children. 

As they were about to leave, one of his step-children asked if they too could get something to eat. Moved by compassion the father asked his daughter if it would be okay with her if the two of them shared the bits of pizza crust she had left behind on her plate? She enthusiastically agreed and so everyone left having eaten something. A great night out.

THE IMMORAL OF THE STORY

I mean that would be fine, right? You would have no problem with that if it was an actual story? We would be able to make statements like ‘Well the five are his real children and the two should be glad that they got something, right?’

Or not? Would we be absolutely disgusted that five of the children got to pig out and two were left with the remains of the meal? Would it not be okay that there was enough money and resources to give everyone a good meal and yet the decision was made to give some people a great meal while some had hardly any meal at all? 

I think if this story was an actual situation where you knew the people, it might be a lot different. The reality of the world where rich and poor live very much like this is a lot easier to turn a blind eye to or even celebrate sometimes, perhaps because the situation of the poor seems so metaphorical [until we actually start to meet them and they become ‘real people’] that it isn’t actually real [as long as we can keep them out of sight, right?]

‘The world has enough for everyone’s need, but not enough for everyone’s greed.’ [Gandhi]

I can’t do anything personally about sports and movie stars ludicrous salaries. But maybe I can start with my own greed. And that of those who I am in close relationship with. Through conversation [it’s not guilt that is going to win this battle, but imaginative creativity might get us places] and wrestling over these things. Mutual accountability. Goal setting and experimentation. Living better.

For people in America in particular, one way of starting to align yourselves to something better might be joining a Common Change group and, together with a group of friends, start meeting some of the needs in the lives of the people you know.

For others of us it might be taking on board the stories of people around us who are doing inspirational and creative things like the Albrecht family in the UK, or Nigel and Trish and their family in Hillbrow, South Africa and asking how that might look for us in our context. For parents of young children, it might be reading some of these stories and seeing if there is anything in there we might be able to take on or whether they inspire us to figure out how our story might look.

It might require us taking a moment to stop and do a stock take of our lives and ask if we are currently living out the values that we profess to have or should we be taking a leaf out of Calvin and Hobbes creator Bill Watterson’s book and simply walking away from the place we currently find ourselves to have landed and being more intentional about choosing the place where we decide to set up camp.

Maybe a small part of not feeling overwhelmed by what is happening in Syria right now could be by being intentional about the things I have the ability to change in my life and context right now?

I mean it’s just step-kids right? They’re not even his real children… 

Words i like: Part ‘Intentional’

I enjoy words, but there are just some that stand tall above the rest.

And I’m not just talking simply about nice sounding words here like ‘cactus’, ‘gesticulate’ or ‘epiphany’, but words  with meanings attached that as a concept are particularly attractive.

The first one, that i declared as my ‘word of the year’ about 5 years ago was the word ‘Intentional’ which i continue to love as a word and as a concept.

It stands in the face of that old saying, ‘If you continue to do what you’ve always done, you’ll continue to get what you’ve always gotten.’

Or the other well-known one that ‘Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results.’

I find it to be such an important word for anyone who calls themself a ‘Christian’ or as i prefer ‘Christ follower’ – in fact i use the term ‘Christ follower’ personally because it is more intentional – it suggest that there is following happening, movement.

And that is what I like about the word ‘Intentional’ – it implies action, forward momentum, focus and moving towards a clear vision.

If you are not intentional in life then it is very easy and quick for things like apathy, procrastination and boredom to creep in.

Intentionality builds on questions such as ‘Who am I?’ and ‘What am I about?’ as well as ‘What is important to me in life?’ and even more personally ‘Who is important to me in life?’ and others. Intentionality leads you towards the life to the full that Jesus spoke about to His followers. It is about ‘being’ more than it is about simply ‘existing’ which is empty, cold and to an extent dead.

So ‘Intentional’ is a word i really like. What is a word you really like?

[To read about another word i really like – Interdependence – click here]

Parking, and Re-creation.

his name is Mark.

youngish guy, i’d say mid twenties and kinda looked a little bit like Mark Brendanawicz. but i don’t think it was him.

[i mean it could have been him cos Mark has been out of the show for a season or two although i don’t think his name is actually ‘Mark’ in real life so he might have used that name. it’s not, Uncle Google says it’s ‘Paul Schneider’]

but he was the airport police “move along” guy who came over to me while i was park-and-waiting for my friend Beth at the airport in San Jose last nite and made me move along…

which i’m used to from Philly cos i used to do a fair number of airport runs there and the police/security on manning the drop-and-go strip there were generally a bunch of angry, moody, obnoxious unfriendly types [i once gave a guy my “ah, really?” face when he made me move despite there being no traffic and me being there making no difference and he stopped me and asked for the car papers and almost confiscated my car – chop!] and so very accustomed to that kind of treatment.

when i came around again he came over to my window and i asked him what the time was saying that we didn’t have a watch or a phone and asking if there was a place i could park and he said the best thing would be to just keep doing laps until my person arrived. but he was very friendly-like.

one lap later i pulled up and he came to me and asked if there was any luck and i asked if i had to go round again and he said no but if i could just pull forward and then for the next ten or twenty minutes he kept letting me pull forward a bit but basically stick around and wait for my people [Val had gone inside to find Beth and her sister when they arrived] and so he really did me a huge favour. when they finally did arrive, they came outside but by then i had moved forward and so Val thought i was doing another lap and took them inside again and there was nothing i could do so i called Mark over and asked him if he could grab then from just inside the door. he completely obliged.

and while i was waiting there i saw him assist two elderly women that were struggling and just generally be polite and courteous with everyone he came into contact with [even people in cars who he made move on]

so thank you Mark. [i am also learning to place huge emphasis on trying to know people’s names because otherwise he was just friendly airport guy and now he is Mark and he has a family and dreams and goals and pain and stuff and so it becomes that little bit more real] if we lived closer i would love to find you and take you out for coffee. in a few minutes you undid many minutes of frustration from previous Philly encounters and gave me hope.

and in the midst of all the people-getting-it-wrong noticing we do and mud flinging the power and beauty in taking a moment to celebrate a good deed or action.

any of you have a Mark this week?

Oscar madness…

in the space of a week we go from the craziness surrounding the public ‘investment’ into the news, gossip and views surrounding the Oscar Pistorius case [where everyone had an opinion, a judgement, a Barry Bateman courtroom tweet to retweet and an emotional or political response] to the 3am [in South Africa] screening of the Academy Awards Oscars ceremony which is a few minutes away from starting…

there seems to be a lot of similarity between the two in terms of the global appeal and interest despite for the most part having nothing to do with the actuality of events [both involving people we watched from a distance and were entertained by in various ways]

there is a lot of make-up and bells and whistles and smoke screens and both ‘shows’ have a sense of mystery to them – a question of what is real and what is being presented to the cameras…

there is also a great deal of difference between the two – the one is about a whole bunch of stuff that really doesn’t matter at all and the other is about something that matters so deeply in so many different ways.

i think a lot of life is being faced with the dilemma of trying to figure out the difference between those two things as they appear in front of you… what really really matters, and what doesn’t really matter at all…

and which of these will you give your attention, time and resources to?

Positive celebrating life story post 1: left-handed pianist Nicholas McCarthy

in the midst of all the recent focus on murder and rape and negativity that has been jamming up the media and our minds and social networks, i figured it was time to seek out some inspirational life-giving stories of positivity and hope – what a gem to begin with:

Just 23 years old, Nicholas McCarthy also appeared at the 2012 Paralympics ‘although McCarthy’s moment of fame came as a musical performer when he played in the closing ceremony with the British Paraorchestra.’

This young British pianist, born without his right hand, has been making an international name for himself as a exceptionally talented and hard-working one-handed pianist.

Read this story here and be ready to be deeply moved by someone who embraces life to the full against all odds and is wowing people the world over.

Watch the video clip with your eyes closed and you won’t believe the dude is playing with one hand only, it is in-sane!

What stories have you found that celebrate life and are worth sharing and being inspired by together?

[to move to the next story dealing with water supply and a whole site of good news for South Africa, click here…]

i went to visit a crippled friend… [but didn’t find one!]

instead i got to hang out with my buddy Uel Maree for about an hour, catching him up on my story for the last two years and getting to hear some of his.

Just over a year ago now, Uel Maree, helping out a girls group on an adventure camp, dived into a river in a spot he knew well as one where they launched canoes regularly, but this time something was different. He has dived hands first, but whether it was a rock or a sand bar, something pushed his hands to the side and he took a direct impact to the head. Paralysed from the neck down and lying face down in the water, not able to do anything about it [but fortunately having taken a big breath] he told me he was filled with incredible peace as his friend who was a life guard was 20m away and would soon see what was wrong and come running. He did, and Uel was carefully taken out of the water and later helicoptered to the hospital where he was given a rather negative prognosis that there was like a 1% chance he would not be completely paralysed from the neck down. Uel and his family chose to think differently and with a huge network of support, much prayer and a fair number of miracles along the way, has physically come to a point far exceeding anything the doctors could imagine… and continues to push through for small breakthrough after small breakthrough.

i guess i was a little nervous arriving at the house and being ushered in by his dad [who first pretended i had arrived at the wrong house to really ease my nerves] as i didn’t really know how the visit was going to go. i had camped as a leader with Uel a couple of years before, but only really knew him through the facebook group that was set up after the accident and so had followed updates there and seen some of the progress and been so hugely encouraged by the amazing network and community that exists there. i had witnessed how the group and Uel had been an encouragement to so many other people besides Uel and a place where people and faith and needs had met up regularly.

so in some ways, i was anticipating hanging out with a crippled guy in a bed or maybe a wheelchair. but as i turned the corner, from the moment of laying eyes on Uel, what i encountered was life to the full. Uel was completely animated and positive and full of humour and just so much life, it really was such a joyful encounter. He started off all interested in my journey and what Val and i have been up to and it was a while before i was able to jump in and direct the conversation to him and his journey and some of what he had gone through.

and it was just completely encouraging and uplifting. having spent just an hour or so with Uel i walked away thinking that i know more crippled people than Uel who have full use of their bodies. i got to ask about the bad days and the times of frustration as well and there certainly are those, but for the most part it feels like Uel, faced with a potentially life-ending scenario, absolutely just chose to make the best out of every part of it and has stubbornly refused to accept any restrictions places upon his body by doctors and specialists as to how far he can go to recover.

what impressed me was how he spoke about God and how it took something like this to happen for him to really understand having a need for God and needing to rely on God and so his faith has increased immensely. a lot of people in a situation like this would no doubt end up feeling sorry for themselves, whereas Uel is going to be co-leading the home group that meets at his house every second week, he is working on pushing his wheelchair around [with specially enhanced door stopped bits added around the edges so he can grab hold of the wheels] and he is a machine on his iPad keeping up with his facebook group and the latest news and happenings.

what a legendary time and what an example of the ‘life to the full’ we are called to in Jesus. thank-you Uel Maree for fitting me into your busy schedule and for showing me a vibrant faith and attitude for really embracing life.

[If you want to read the piece Uel wrote on Sharing Dreams, click here]

[For Uel’s piece on Living with Disability where he shares some more of his story, click here]

a stream of conscience-ness

crawling through the desert on my hands and knees, torn jeans clinging desperately to my legs, shirt mostly in tatters, hanging loosely off my shoulders… eyes darting to and fro, hoping to catch sight of, a quick glimpse, the hint of, a water source, river, stream, oasis of sorts… some type of cactus with juicy flesh waiting for me to discover in its hidden caverns the satiation for my current devastation, even temporary relief for my present disbelief of the localised unbelief that seems to surround me on all sides, pressing in, trying to suffocate, attempting to deprecate, to abbreviate, or proliferate its… their, own sense of being marginalised, disenfranchised, tied up, held up, brought up, bought into sense of hopelessness, of clung to plausible deniability, of watered down potentiality… minimalistic expression of a far deeper, richer, more vibrant, on offer life experience that suddenly, once more, slaps me into wakefulness, renewing the drive onwards, pushing me further away from those who will contain me in their quicksand filled, undisclosed and scattered leftover buried mine encased mime constructed boxes of delapidated individuality brought about by the refined redefined personal definition of a wholly holy majestical greater power defined way of existing…

me, my, mine is the call of those who will fashion the path that has already been marked out for me by the One who Lovingly, and Loving me, took it upon Himself to walk it before me, leaving tell-tale signs along the way of His greater intention, His life-interrupting intervention that comes to me [did i mention?] as a whisper, as a quiet voice i can sometimes barely make out hidden in the backgrounds of a gentle breeze, a rapid flash of cover, a hint, a suggestion, a spirit-filled gut feel that points out, draws me out, calls me out, points me to, takes me to, makes me to… change my course, alter the discourse, discover the resource that already lies deep within me…

for history is not my story, it’s His story, but one in which He has invited me to participate, and regenerate, [dare i alliterate?] revelling in the revealing revolutionary revelation of His rambunctious glory, grace and gracious generosity. are you starting to see? will you align with me? but not dispassionately. i desperately and hungrily require some brutal introspective honesty. i am not looking for empathy. i need you walking alongside me. i’m not asking for another one of me. like some kind of test tube created science experimental experience of trying to mess with destiny. i am feeling a little alone here. so why would i be wanting a clone here? bump my head against another loner? i am asking for, appealing for, calling for, crying out for you. are you with me? i am wanting someone who has a hunger for more than games, who nurses a need for more than speed, who has a panoramic vision and life focus that is both from here and to eternity…

are you in? can i count on you? lean on you? walk this road with you? crawl through the desert on my hands and knees, torn jeans clinging desperately to my legs, shirt mostly in tatters, hanging loosely off my shoulders, with you? eyes darting to and fro, hoping to catch sight of, a quick glimpse, the hint of, a water source, river, stream, oasis of sorts… what’s that you see?