Tandem Post: Tonight you’re mine, completely

i am loving being a part of this Tandem Blogging series with 8 other very creative and very different individuals. There is the dual satisfaction of having a very focused piece to write on a topic i didn’t choose [which is incredible for creativity] and then also the thrill of bouncing from post to post once we’ve released them, to see how differently each writer interpreted the title each week. Last week was my favourite week out of the 5 i have been part of, and despite this week’s title being a little more dangerous, i am looking forward to seeing how everyone tackled it. Hee, hee, i said ‘tackle’.

So read this one and then please take a look at as many of the others as you can and please do us the honour of sharing any of these that you really enjoyed:

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Tonight you’re mine, completely

Draft 1: Tonight you're mine, completely.

Draft 2: Two Knights. You're mine. Complete. [Leigh]

Draft 3: To Knights, Ewe are mine! Compete? [Leigh]

Draft 4: Dear Members of the Round Table. The female sheep belong to me. Wanna fight about it? [Lee]

Draft 5: Deer members. Get off the round table. Wool bearer ownership decided. A duel? [Lee]

Draft 6: Buck! Remove yourselves from the wooden table! A knitter has been duly decided upon.

Draft 7: The buck stops here. Unstable. A familiar pattern has been selected.

Draft 8: President. Unstable set. Recognition. Choice.

Draft 9: A precedent has been set. I recognise this in the one I have chosen.

Draft 10: Tonight you're mine, completely.

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Having read the rest of the posts for this week i feel like everyone has done some amazing incredible work and so please give yourself some time to read at least a few of the others, if not all of them.

The writing is all different flavours of great, but which one will be YOUR favourite this week?

Cath: https://cathjenkin.wordpress.com

Scott: http://squidsquirts.blogspot.com

Kerry: http://www.kerrycontrary.com

James: http://www.jamespreston.org

Megan: http://www.meganshead.co.za

Sarah: https://medium.com/@ricegirl2

Dave: https://bloggsymalone.wordpress.com

Nick: https://medium.com/@nick_frost

[To return to the first Tandem Post i took part in with the theme of ‘Meeting the Queen’, click here]

Tandem Post: Ninety-NinE

Pearls before Swine is my favourite comic strip as a lot of you know and i thought this was particularly apt as it introduces the topic of today’s Tandem Blog post [where i, alongside 8 other bloggerists, get given a title and have to write whatever post it inspires] which is simply:

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Ninety-ninE

Nectarine, you ask? Well it does happen to be a peach’s kin

Is then a meditational appreciator of the bacterial fermentation process not a yogi?

Nuts! You exclaim, as you read the peanut packaging warning that “nut traces may be found within”

Elderberries carry a similar disappointment of not being simply a youngberry that has reached senioric age

There lies with food, even before one receives a taste, the subtle hint of a deeper to-be-had enjoyment

Yet we typically gloss over the possibility of hidden character traits to simply head for those we personally enjoy

–

Nervous as the avocado may appear to be, would you instinctively consider her humourly barren?

Is the mushroom, after all, once he has been given space to wind down from a hard day’s work, not a fungi?

No! It’s time we moved away from these presupposed speculatory judgements, premised on gustatory satisfaction?

Engage in deeper understanding of who your food at its very heart may really prove to be.

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[Interesting piece of writing, you may be thinking. But i’m not quite sure how that relates to the theme. Although most of you probably were nodding your head and making the appropriate aaahing and oohing sounds in an Emperor’s Clothes kind of “Well of course, it is. Don’t YOU think it is? I saw it straight away. Did you not see it?” kind of way. Well, what if i write it out once more, but with a little bit of a nudge. Right away, you might notice the beginnings and go, “Well, that IS rather fun. But anyone can do beginnings. Good show sir, well done.” If you let your eye linger for just a moment longer, then the endings might come into view, and maybe that will be enough for you to… well…]

Ninety-ninE

Nectarine, you ask? Well it does happen to be a peach’s kin

Is then a meditational appreciator of the bacterial fermentation process not a yogi?

Nuts! You exclaim, as you read the peanut packaging warning that “nut traces may be found within”

Elderberries carry a similar disappointment of not being simply a youngberry that has reached senioric age

There lies with food, even before one receives a taste, the subtle hint of a deeper to-be-had enjoyment

Yet we typically gloss over the possibility of hidden character traits to simply head for those we personally enjoy

–

Nervous as the avocado may appear to be, would you instinctively consider her humourly barren?

Is the mushroom, after all, once he has been given space to wind down from a hard day’s work, not a fungi?

No! It’s time we moved away from these presupposed speculatory judgements, premised on gustatory satisfaction?

Engage in deeper understanding of who your food at its very heart may really prove to be.

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This post is part of a tandem blogging exercise with 9 other bloggerists. One title unwrapped by nine bloggerists. We realise that 9 is a lot of posts to read, but there is a lot of great stuff to be looked at, so please do your best. Why not start with Cath’s post over here,followed by Scott which you can find over here. Make sure you see what Kerry came up with over here. Then the rest of the posts can be found below. Maybe bookmark this page and spend the next week checking all of them out. Please share your thoughts on our fun exercise in the comments on each post, and remember that with bloggerists, sharing is always caring. 

James: http://www.jamespreston.org/

Megan: http://www.meganshead.co.za/

Sarah: https://medium.com/@ricegirl2

Dave: http://bloggsymalone.wordpress.com

Nick: https://medium.com/@nick_frost

Tandem Post: The Art of Boredom

“THAT… IS COMPLETE AND UTTER… RUBBISH!” D muttered, before slamming the door on his way out.

B hated his roommate!

Oh sure, it had seemed like a good idea at the time. Move in with Death? Everyone had been completely jealous. What in the world could be more exciting than that?

And to be honest, in the beginning it had been.

The thrill of watching the sand slowly pouring through the hourglasses. Sneaking a quick peek at whose time was coming next when the old boneshaker was asleep [or at least his version of ‘asleep’ which really meant sitting upright on a chair at the dining table with a pillowcase over his skull to block out some of the light – it could be fairly disconcerting if you walked into the room and found him there].

B’s personal highlight was watching Death struggle awkwardly every single time he mounted his horse Binky before he took off on a job. Every. Single. Time. Why he, Death, chose to ride a real live horse was beyond him. Something dramatic no doubt. Death was nothing short of dramatic.

And yet, as time passed, and in this apartment time really did pass, the initial thrill had worn off quickly.

Death had refused to let him take a look at his own hourglass, muttering something about it not being in the rules, and had kept it well hidden in a secured location somewhere B had as yet been unable to discover.

Oh, and let’s face it, B thought to himself yet again, Death was also a bit of a dick.

He paused for a moment and looked back at his painting. It really wasn’t THAT bad, he thought, before slipping his brush back into the grey and dabbing at the bowl of fruit he was trying to re-create. His mind returned once more to his thoughts about his roommate.

He refused to do his share of the dishes, he always left stuff lying around the apartment, who knows WHAT that thing was in the container right at the back of the fridge – it was beginning to smell beyond bad, and if he paid the most careful of attention as he moved his eyes away from looking directly at it, his peripheral vision was pretty convinced it was starting to move.

B poked once more at the banana, which was starting to look a bit like a… like a… well, clearly not all that much like a banana. He carefully put down the brush, and sighed.

It wasn’t like he didn’t have time to clear up after Death. His own work was so tedious, he was frankly glad any time he came home to find any form of distraction to busy himself with. After another hard day of what? Distributing kitten and baby videos on the various social network platforms. Organising weather forecasts for London.School history orals, political speakers, library visits and apartment bathroom floor tile selection. Not quite the stuff to make a poor ageing mum proud.

‘Maybe I am jealous? Could that be it?’

B picked up his latest creation. ‘Creation’ is a bit of a strong word for this, he thought to himself. ‘Attempt.’ Yes, that’s better. Just.

He took it into his bedroom and tossed it uncaringly on the pile with all the others. Take up a hobby? Whatever had he been thinking?

He threw himself on to his bed and within minutes he had completely succumbed to ennui and despair.

‘Ooh, this is good,’ he thought out loud. ‘This i can use. Perhaps i shall keep that up after all.’

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[With a wink and a nod to the late legend, Terry Pratchett, whose portrayal of Death [my absolute favouritest character of his] i borrowed from to help make my story realer, and whose birthday it would have been yesterday as i wrote this]

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This post is part of a tandem blogging exercise with 9 other bloggerists. One title unwrapped by nine bloggerists. We realise that 9 is a lot of posts to read, but there is a lot of great stuff to be looked at, so please do your best. Why not start with Cath’s post over here, followed by Scott which you can find over here. Welcome Kerry who is new to the team by reading what she came up with over here. Then the rest of the posts can be found below. Maybe bookmark this page and spend the next week checking all of them out. Please share your thoughts on our fun exercise in the comments on each post, and remember that with bloggerists, sharing is always caring. 

Cath: https://t.co/98AE4tkase

Scott: http://squidsquirts.blogspot.com/2015/04/the-art-of-boredom.html

Kerry: https://t.co/zEWHwIT1kh

James: http://www.jamespreston.org/2015/04/the-art-of-boredom.html

Megan: http://www.meganshead.co.za/the-art-of-boredom

Sarah: https://t.co/rHoS76QhMt

Dave: http://t.co/2G0tFmSrSn

Nick: https://medium.com/@nick_frost/the-art-of-boredom-e5da71765c91

[To see the first Tandem Post i did with the title, ‘Meeting the Queen’, click here]