it takes a village to raise a book

Well, today is book launch day.

This has been a long time coming. And then suddenly over the last few months and then especially the last four weeks, someone cranked up the speed and there was a loud WHOOSH and now it is here.

And tonite i will get to celebrate with largely friends and family [and perhaps some new friends i haven’t met yet]

Today is not really the moment-of-truth day – people who love you will buy and read your book. That’s the easy part. It’s getting people who don’t know you and love you to decide that they want to read your book that is the real challenge.

But tonight is largely about celebrating, and it feels in some way like the build up to a wedding – far too many people i want to get to hang with [Dreadlock Mike is coming! All the way from Durban! Super stoked!] all in a room for far too short a time and probably just enough time for a lot of hugs. And some reflection and sharing and introducing my ‘baby’ to the room.

In a room full of legends tonight, four people stand out for special mention in terms of helping get this ‘baby’ happening:

Kirsten Sims: My old friend, who is not actually old, jumped in during one of the most busiest thesis-finishing degree-completing times of her life to produce this more than incredible book cover which people are in love with and which really just adds some heart and soul and simplicity [which is what the book is all about] to ‘i, church’ – i cannot thank her enough but you can take a look at her site and some more of her incredible artwork and show all your friends: http://kirstensims.blogspot.com

Linda Martindale: An older friend in terms of how long i have known her, Linda was one of the two women [Heather Bailey in the UK who i know would be here if she could] who said to me, “Let’s do this thing!” and actually meant it. Linda is one of the most passionate and authentic people i know, with a huge heart for reconciliation and kingdom and without her jumping in i don’t know how this whole process would have gotten started. She has edited me for many years for Closer to God publications and did a final read through and helped catch a lot of stuff as we got closer to B day.

Susan Minne [nee Anderson]: It is such a bonus for me to have my older secret sister [as in most of my friends in Cape Town knew my younger sister Dawn growing up, but Sue left early and was often a cause for “Oh, i didn’t know you had an older sister” when i mentioned her] at the book launch during her short visit from Texas where she and her family live. Sue jumped in at close to the last minute, when a proofreader pulled out, to help with the final edit and proofread and after a speed course in ‘Understanding Fishwrite’ where she learnt the difference between intentional and unintentional mauling of the English language, she dived in and worked some hard and quick hours to make the book you are going to read a lot better and tighter than the one i gave her.

Finally, and by no means leastly, tbV, the beautiful Val, my wife and life companion who was insistent on creating space for me both before we left for Americaland and since coming back to get this thing finished and out there. She has also largely been the driving force for how tonight is going to look and feel and i am very excited to see and experience all of that. i love that i have a wife that thinks about things eeply, that wrestles with the kind of easy answers that are often spewed out and who is up to fighting for things that are real and count and will make a difference. i am proud that she will be standing alongside me tonite.

There are definitely many more legends who will be in the room tonite, but these are four that deserved special mention. It seriously does take a village to raise a book and from people who gave me quotes about church, to people who journeyed with me through different expressions and understandings of church, to the many people who volunteered to read and comment on early drafts of ‘i, church’ and everyone who is helping out with today, Saturday and Tuesday [and any book launches that may follow] i am so very grateful.

Thank you for allowing this to happen. My prayer is that the words of this book will make a difference. Will cause people to think more deeply and challenge inherited understandings and practices, and more than anything to chase after being the kind of church that God calls us to be. Which is a body of people who are used in transforming the world through lived out love.

Let the games begin…

[For more information about the various book launches that we have going in the next few days, click here]

One person who gives me hope in South Africa is: James Fernie [c/o Sammi Taylor]

My good friend Sammi Taylor has written for my blog a number of times, the most popular being a glimpse into her story of Singleness and one of my favourites being how she wrote her ‘What I’d like my married friends to know’ piece. But today she is sharing about someone she knows in South Africa, who she has seen doing things that give her hope:

I was a teenager in the 80’s. I was a teenager when apartheid was in effect. I was in Matric when we had our first referendum vote. And I was ignorant of most politics. Life was mostly good and happy. I danced, listened to hair metal and spent many hours practicing for plays and shows with my friends. I was mostly ignorant and oblivious. This was true for most of my friends as we grew up in middle class white families and went to white schools with white teachers and most media did not show what was happening in our country. During this time and while being involved with a high school play that included our brother school Selbourne College, I met and became friends with a group of young guys. One of these friends was a boy named James. James was not ignorant or oblivious even though he came from a white middle class family, went to a white school and had white teachers.

I got to know that James was interested in politics. That James’s family was politically active and that he had a passion for justice and the future of our country.

Being kids, this was just something I was aware of. I didn’t ask questions or have deep conversations. My memories of this time are of parties and laughing backstage at concerts and being very confused about the math homework they were doing which looked like nothing we were being taught at the time.

So many years later after meeting another group of young people through a dance and drama ministry team in 1994 and becoming a lot less ignorant and oblivious to what was happening in our country and of course the invention of the world wide web and Facebook, I reconnected with my young friend James.

There is so much negativity amongst our generation regarding SA at the moment and where we are going that it was refreshing to see that someone I knew as a young boy had not lost his passion for our country. After obtaining a law degree and working and travelling abroad, he had returned to SA and is actively involved in community based projects that benefit from funds raised by conducting responsible tours of these previously disadvantaged areas.

Uthando is the name of the organization he created to explore unique and innovative methods of linking tourism and community development projects. As a result of these initiatives, Uthando has won numerous local and international awards, most notably the 2012 Winner of the Skal International Sustainable Development in Tourism Award – category Cities-Villages, the 2013 Cape Town Tourism Responsible Tourism Award as voted by local and international companies in the tourism industry and The Best Charitable Organisation in Africa by the Good Safari Guide in 2014 and 2015. In addition, The Philanthropic Travel Experiences offered by Uthando have been recognized by Trip Advisor with a Certificate of Excellence in 2012, 2013 and 2014.

Uthando South Africa is a unique model for traveller’s philanthropy, providing local and international tourism businesses (e.g. tour operators) with a reliable and trustworthy mechanism to implement their social investment programmes. This newly FFTSA (Fair Trade in Tourism South Africa) certified initiative showcases beneficiary projects to travellers in an authentic and sustainable way, further increasing prospects for fundraising and other forms of assistance for these projects. Uthando South Africa currently supports and/or is developing a programme of support for over 25 community projects in Cape Town (with additional projects identified in the KwaZulu Natal midlands); these are focused on a diverse range of social issues ranging from female prisoner rehabilitation and refugee education to urban agriculture, youth development, care for the elderly, care for children and orphans, HIV/AIDS, care and education for disabled people, arts and culture and rural development, to mention a few.

According to Katie Goldstein who listed Uthando as the no.6 of the top 10 things to do in Cape Town: To experience the Townships created as living areas for non-whites during Apartheid, but are still home to a vast amount of the population today, do a half-day experience with Uthando whose tours are authentic, uplifting, and non-invasive. Uthando’s profits go to help raise funds for community development projects in South Africa. In addition to learning about the country’s tumultuous past, you’ll be inspired by the incredible work being done to move forward.

James has a deep sense of compassion and a firm belief in the urgency of profound and dramatic change in the paradigm of our human society and this hasn’t changed from the young boy I knew.

I love Facebook…when I see James’s updates on his projects and his joy and pride in the communities he serves I am given hope that South Africa has a bright future when people like James are involved.

To find out more, visit:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ANP-9HcmkjA

www.uthandosa.org

Responsible Travellers’ Oct-Nov issue

[For the next story of someone giving hope in South Africa, click here]

Who is someone that you see doing something positive in South Africa that gives you hope? Drop me a line at brettfish@hotmail.com ad let’s talk about how you can get there story on here

One person who gives me hope in South Africa is: Nicky Kemele [c/o Pippa Shaper]

One person who gives me hope in SA is: Nicky Kemele

Nicky is one of our 33 amazing foster mothers at Home from Home – an
organisation which sets up and runs supported and supervised community
based foster homes for vulnerable children in the Western Cape. Nicky was
our very first foster mother when we started Home from Home ten years ago
in 2005. Nicky, who was working as a nanny for a family in Fish Hoek,
started volunteering at a children’s home in Khayelitsha where she lives,
in 2003. That¹s where she first found out about becoming a foster mom with
Home from Home.

Nicky says that she was inspired to foster by her own mother back in the Eastern Cape. Her mom had been orphaned at the age of two, and was bought up by other people,
often under very cruel circumstances, and at one stage ended up living outside eating
with the dogs as no one was caring for her properly.

Believing that no child should have to grow up as her mother did, Nicky
wanted to make a difference in the lives not just of children who needed a
loving home, but also to make a difference in her own and her mom’s life.
And she has done just that. Five children who came into her care in 2005
are still with her today, together with another girl who joined their
family in 2010. Nicky loves her foster children just as much as she loves
her own grown up children. Two years ago, Nicky’s mom died, but she was so
proud of what her daughter had achieved; creating a loving family home for
children who have no families of their own.

Though Nicky’s story is a one-off, our other 32 foster mothers all have
their own reasons for taking on this most precious of challenges – caring
for children who are not their own by birth. Sadly, there are many
children in South Africa who need foster care and a place to call home.
Nicky and her sisterhood of foster mothers give us all hope in this
incredible country of ours.

[as shared by Pippa Shaper]

You can learn more about Home from Home by visiting their site over here.

[To read another story of hope involving James Fernie and community development, click here]

Who is someone that YOU think is doing something positive in South Africa that gives you hope. Drop me a line at brettfish@hotmail.com and let’s talk about how you can get their story up here…

To Be A Dad – meet Dave Gale

To be a Dad

I’m heading towards 50, a father to a 19yo son Dylan, and an 18yo daughter Brynn.  I lost my dad this year and I miss him terribly.  I seem to have done a fairly good job of fathering my kids if other people’s unsolicited comments are anything to go by.  There are a good few things I regret not having done, but very few I regret doing. Here are some of my thoughts in response to Brett’s call for “to be a dad” articles.  I hope they resonate with someone and encourage you to be more intentional about fatherhood:

Fatherhood is hard.

Every dad has a large “Learner” plate on his back and seldom admits it.  The lack of good fathering, I firmly believe, is a root cause of many weaknesses in our society, but that’s a whole new topic.  You don’t have to stand alone though, and you have a great role model to follow if you study Him well.  Anyone who views God as a vengeful, aloof, distant deity has clearly not read the bible diligently.  The essence of all I believe about life, finances, career, and fatherhood stems from my understanding of what it means to call God “Father”.

Be there.

The first thing I’d say to any young father is that you need to make time for your kids.  Quality time is good, but quite frankly just showing up for bath time, bed time, reading-to-them time, is better than attending the odd sports day or prize-giving (do make those a priority though!). Later, you might want to be more intentional about time for ‘doing stuff together’ that broadens horizons and minds, and is great for bonding. Pounce on opportunities (no, rather make opportunities!) to have intentional conversations about life; the half hour or so, lifting or walking your kids to school can be life-changing.

Share.

Moms do this naturally; dads don’t. Find other dads who share your principles and conspire with them.  Make time to talk about the challenges; how to enforce boundaries, how to deal with mood swings, defiance, deviant behaviour. A teacher at my son’s school started a movement called Engage Schools, where the school initiated meetings for fathers of boys at the school to get together to hear from older, wiser fathers, and to share their own experiences.  It doesn’t have to be that big – it can be 2 or 3 of you. Grab a beer together, have a braai… but bring up your kids together.

Create traditions and memories.

I regret not doing some sort of coming of age ceremony with our kids. I regret not creating more family traditions (who cares if it only starts with you, if it lasts for generations and creates a means of growing women and men of character and stature in your family!). We decided to view our kids as adults at 16, but unless you mark that somehow, the rest of your family won’t treat them that way and it can be problematic.

Kick the kids out of home.

That really is your job, believe or not.  By the time you are finished fathering, they need to be able to stand alone to a large degree, with a healthy view of who they are; how to be active and constructive members of society and their community and how to be good parents.  If you are a God-fearing man, then you need to have given them the foundation of knowledge of Father God and the means to make their own relationship with Him.

Love and protect their mother (from them!).

One of the best ways of giving your kids the best childhood possible is to love their mother fiercely and openly.  Kids see through pretence like glass.  You chose to be their father and her partner – step up to the plate.  When they get to their teens and your wife’s nurturing role starts to wind down and your preparation-for-the-future role kicks up a gear, you will need to let them know quite clearly that when you promised to love and protect her, it included protecting her from them.  Do not let your kids disrespect or bully your wife, ever.  They will be all the better for it.

Be the hero you’d want them to emulate.

This is hard, but you have to be the person, you’d want them to look up to.  It does not mean you have to hide flaws and be perfect.  It does mean you have to remain true to your principles, stand up for injustice, be the change, not tolerate wrong, apologise when you’ve screwed up, keep going when it is hard.  I have a copy of Rudyard Kipling’s “if” on my office wall; I like to think it applies to fatherhood as much as it does to manhood.  If you won’t be that hero, someone else will and they may not share your values.

Provide.

Tough job, but your kids should never feel that dad will not always be doing his level best to provide food, shelter and security.  I’m not talking about the latest fashion accessories; I’m talking about meeting needs and keeping them safe. You in turn can look to God as Father for that – the Word is full of examples of His faithfulness in this. I can testify to that.

Young adults.

I caught myself in a yelling match with one of my kids over the age of 16, I forget which one.  I remember clearly realising that I was expecting them to behave like an adult just because they wanted me to treat them as one. Not exactly fair when they’ve spent the last 16 years being kids!  When I realised that I had to allow them to still behave like kids while treating them as young adults and gently guiding them into adult behaviour, the stress levels lowered and we stopped fruitlessly yelling at each other.  Home was more pleasant for it.

Give direction and then step back.

As my son stepped through the security gates to catch a plane to the USA to spend 3 months being a leader on a Summer Camp earlier this year, I realised that at that moment there was nothing more I could do for him, he was on his own with only his experiences, observations, learning and Father God to guide him.  It’s worth giving time to thinking about what sort of things you’d want your kids to be able to do if you’re not around any more, from changing a tire or the oil in the car, to applying for a bank loan, to keeping their integrity and soul intact.  Give them direction, give them learning opportunities, then stand back and let them fail.  Help them up again, and be there while they take wing.

I seldom saw my dad after I turned 18 and went to varsity; we lived in different provinces and visited infrequently. I always knew that he loved me unconditionally and that he was there for me if I needed advice or guidance.  It’s my turn to be there for my kids now.  I’m not alone though; no dad has to be.  My dad died while my son was in the US.  Dylan sent me this to read at my dad’s funeral and it completely undid me:

“… I take comfort in knowing that he was the man who made my dad who he is and my dad is the reason I am the way I am today. I will miss him like crazy and never forget him as long as I live.”

It is a privilege to be a dad; don’t waste a moment of it.

[The one glaring omission here is that fathering is meant to be only one side side of the parenting coin. Standing back to back with me at times, but mostly alongside me, is a wonderful, long suffering soul-mate, my wife Barbara, mom to both of my kids. Without a life partner, I can only imagine how hard being a dad must be.]

[To read Tim van de Venter’s thoughts on ‘To Be A Dad’ click here]

[For a whole collection of posts on the theme of ‘To Be A Mom’ click here]

 

when Desmond Tutu met No_bob [part III]

 

Continuing with my share from  ‘Revisiting The Truth and Reconciliation Commission’s Faith Community Hearing’ as we look at some of the messages that came out of the second day:

FROM THE TWITTERER [Day 1 of 2]

While 140 character messages don’t capture the whole of what was experienced, hopefully they will help you to catch a bit of a glimpse:

#TRC General buzz in the air. Today it is a lot of testimony from other faith groups so should be interesting.

#TRC In our hunger for reconciliation maybe justice was held at bay. Economic justice. Restitution.

#TRC It’s as if, with the advent of democracy, we gave our mission and ministry to the government.

#TRC Without love, without justice, without genuine fairness, there can be no reconciliation.

 

#TRC Thulani Ndlanzi (Cong): we have promoted a non-racial community rather than a multi-racial community.

#TRC [Thulani Ndlanzi just raised the bar with that presentation recognising so many vital local issues.]

 

#TRC Have we lost our minds? Link back to earlier devotion. Where we have grown complacent and normalized injustice.

 

#TRC [Really enjoying Thulani Ndlanzi. Speaking it like it is. ‘it should be a given that when we drafting laws we focus on women’s rights.’]

#TRC Thulani Ndlanzi: We need to bring God back into schools. What good is it to have a good mathematician with no ethics?

#TRC Thulani Ndlanzi: What good is it to produce a great scientist who has no morals?

 

#TRC Nadine Bowers du Toit (TEASA): South Africans for the most part seem to have a love hate relationship with reconciliation.

 

#TRC Brigalia Bam (SACC): Quoting Mandela – You will need to re-interpret your theology that allowed you to accept apartheid.

#TRC Brigalia Bam quoting Mandela -Now is not the time for the churches to return to the cosiness of the sanctuary.

 

#TRC Malusi Mpumlwana (SACC): We hear more about social cohesion than we do about national reconciliation.

 

#TRC Hlengiwe Mkhize [panel]: Reconciliation is a generational issue.

 

#TRC Wow, Thandile Khona, black guy, really giving it to the Muslims in terms of black inclusion within Muslim leadership.

#TRC Thandile Khona is President of Muslim Youth Movement. Really interested to hear what Maulana Abdul Khaliq Allie has to say next.

#TRC Maulana Abdul Khaliq Allie (Sect Gen Muslim Traditional Council): We believe South Africans are waiting on the religious leaders today.

#TRC Maulana Abdul Khaliq Allie: As a religious community we have to be critical of our govt when it comes to corruption.

 

#TRC Yasmin Sooka: We all have our internal contradictions & in religion this often relates to how do we treat those who are different.

 

#TRC [Really interesting session listening to the muslim representatives. Some great points.]

 

#TRC Nalini Gangen (Maha Sabha) just made it clear that all Indians should not be seen through the lens of that one family. #GuptasArentUs

#TRC Nalini Gangen: Hindu marriage not being recognised. Sale of house documents for eg would reflect them as unmarried.

#TRC Nalini Gangen: How we react to what happens and is happening is based on what we have seen.

 

#TRC Reuben Shapiro from South African Jewish Voices for a Just Peace. This just got political. Gaza statement happening.

#TRC Reuben Shapiro – The Jewish voice in South Africa is not homogenous.

 

#TRC Big moment of humour as Tutu goes to a mic way too high for him and does a huge jump ‘to reach it’. [TbV hysterical].

 

#TRC Tutu recounting story of man being tortured – ‘These are God’s children & they need me to help them recover the dignity they are losing.’

#TRC Tutu: As we listen i hope we hear more than just the words. That we remember that we are surrounded by some incredible people.

#TRC [Inspirational break as Tutu gets up and recounts some stories of some of the people in the room.]

 

#TRC The post apartheid generation. Not sure where the segregation comes from. We need to create spaces to share our stories.

 

#TRC Frank Chikane: The job is not yet finished. South Africa has a long way to go to deal with the pain of the past. Black and white pain.

 

#TRC Imam Rashied Omar – It’s not the job of the state to do forgiveness.

#TRC Rashied Omar: Bicycle theology. You stole my bicycle. Years later you are sorry. But where’s my bicycle?

[Loved that analogy – found it really helped get my mind a little more about the idea of Economic and Land Reparation that still needs to happen]

#TRC Rashied Omar: Too much co-operation with the state. But we were co-opted by the state. Don’t fly flags in the church.

 

#TRC Eddie van der Borght (Amsterdam): The urgency of this moment, the momentum, should not be lost.

 

#TRC Nico Koopman – I think one of the reasons we live so distant from each other is because we still live with stereotypes of each other.

#TRC Nico Koopman – Please notice the abnormality in the normality.

#TRC Nico Koopman – Words are important because words create worlds. But we need to move beyond words to other types of action.

#TRC Nico Koopman. Forgiveness paves the way for reconciliation, restitution and reparation. It makes us hungry for more.

 

#TRC Tutu: This is one of the maddest countries. #TellingStoriesOfInsaneForgiveness

#TRC Tutu: This thing we are talking about [TRC] was a broken instrument. But God used it.

#TRC Tutu: We should be taking off our shoes. Cos this is holy ground.

#TRC Tutu: We are a country that is meant to show the world how we are supposed to be a family of God.

#TRC Tutu just threw away his closing address and is winging it by the Spirit. #PowerfulEnd

 

And let me close with some other Tweets from some others who were there:

 

@rogersaner “Somehow we haven’t been able to translate the large religious presence in SA into justice.” – @digitaldion #TRC

@changeagentSA “@TutuLegacy: Nyobole: “In the past we have neglected our role in education but are reclaiming our role” #TRC

@tutulegacy The biggest beneficiaries of apartheid were the business communities. #TRC

@tutulegacy Pillay: “Unity is a gift given to us by God. We need a bigger vision. Jesus calls us to be one.” #TRC

@rogersaner An obvious need coming out of today is for white South Africans to do some serious work to face and own the past and privilege #TRC

@digitaldion ‘Now is not the time for the Churches to retreat to the safety of the sanctuary’ Nelson Mandela #TRC comment in 1997. Still true today!

@val_c_anderson We need a different kind of theology that can underpin action – “contextual theology”. #TRC

@val_c_anderson “There’s no such thing as apolitical religion.” ~ Dr Rashied Omar. #TRC

 

So there you have it. Does not do what happened the last two days immense justice, but hopefully gives glimpses and some challenging ideas and concepts to reflect on and wrestle with.

A big thing that came out looking back at the original TRC is that perhaps we focused too much on Truth that we overlooked justice.

Another big idea that was said on many occasions was the need for reparation and land reform [of which fairly little has been done] to add to the reconciliation and justice that did happen.

A big failure was that the church/faith communities as a whole seemed to sit back and hope the government would take the lead on Reconciliation , whereas the Government had initially hoped that the church would pick up and continue the work of the TRC in hundreds of little TRC’s all over the country [which never really happened and quite possibly because it was not well communicated enough]

The church/faith communities as a whole has failed to be involved enough in areas of Reconciliation and has a lot of work to do. The majority of the people in South Africa would fall into some kind of faith community and so it seems to make a lot of sense that if the faith communities as a whole got serious about this stuff it should and would happen.

And more… we closed off by singing the national anthem together which was a powerful moment.

[To return to the beginning of my reflections on these two days, click here]

 

 

 

 

 

when Desmond Tutu met No_bob

So former Archbishop Desmond Tutu [or present Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu, whatever an Emeritus might be] must be the most famous purple-dress-wearing man in the whole of Africa.

No_bob the yellow-and-white [yes, he’s still not nor ever has been blue] stuffed dolphin, is the world’s most famous stuffed dolphin [largely because the competition in that particular field is highly limited] and called No_bob because he doesn’t, well, bob.

It was inevitable that one day the two would meet. And by ‘inevitable’ i mean ‘highly unlikely’.

Yet, somehow they did.

And it really was one of the smallest and least significant moments of the last two days [but still quite fun, especially when you look at the panic’d GET-ME-OUT-OF-HERE look on his face]

WHAT WAS IT ALL ABOUT THEN?

For the last two days i was really privileged to be a witness to a meeting that was titled, ‘Revisiting The Truth and Reconciliation Commission’s Faith Community Hearing’ which was ‘a Consultation presented by the Beyers Naude Centre for Public Theology, Faculty of Theology, Stellenbosch University in collaboration with the Desmond and Leah Tutu Legacy Foundation.’

The original TRC, according to Wikipedia, ‘was a court-like restorative justice body assembled in South Africa after the abolition of apartheid. Witnesses who were identified as victims of gross human rights violations were invited to give statements about their experiences, and some were selected for public hearings. Perpetrators of violence could also give testimony and request amnesty from both civil and criminal prosecution.’

A seeking out of Truth and Reconciliation after the tragic years of apartheid and following the miracle of the peaceful release of Nelson Mandela, the unbanning of the ANC and other organisations and the first free and fair elections that the majority of South Africans were for the first time eligible to take part in.

At the same time there was a TRC that happened specifically with the Faith Communities in mind in 1997, and this particular meeting was revisiting that in some way, giving Faith community representatives the opportunity to remember the testimony they had given then, as well as share where their community found themselves now in the process.

According to the Faculty of Theology in Stellenbosch website,

The aims of the re-enactment hearing are:

• To put the process of reconciliation back on the main agenda of all faith communities in South Africa;
• To make a significant contribution to reconciliation and national unity in the current South African context;
• To contribute to the development of responsible and realistic reconciliation strategies for the faith communities, and offer practical suggestions on how to address the challenges of reconciliation and nation building in our land.

A VERY BASIC OVERVIEW

There is no way i can effectively put into words even a good summary of the last two day’s events, but i felt i needed to write something and so hopefully i can give some small glimpses and highlights or key points that came out.

The format, sandwiched between and introduction and closing remarks by Archbishop Emeritus Desmond Tutu [who i will refer to from now as ‘The Arch’ as everyone else seems to – he’s held No_bob so we should pretty much be on a nickname basis] and a time of reflection and audience participation at the end, was a large number of sections of different church denominational representatives, other faith representatives and one or two denominational network representatives sharing their thoughts both on the past meeting and where their group was now.

Each group was given thirty minutes which was meant to comprise 15 minutes of sharing and then some engagement and Q and A with the panel which was made up of Ms Yasmin Sooka, Prof Hlengiwe Mkhize, Ms Glenda Wildschut and Prof Piet Meiring, asking some questions and a time of response. Putting ministers and church leaders in front of a mic in a South African context meant that didn’t always happen to the program, but we did get through most of what was planned with some creativity and improvisational tea breaks.

As far as denominations went, among those who shared were the Catholic, Anglican, Methodist, Presbyterian, Lutheran, Baptist, Congregational, AFM and a number of the more traditionally Afrikaans churches like the NGK, NHK and more.  Then both TEASA [The Evangelical Alliance of South Africa] and SACC [The South African Council of Churches] shared as well as representatives from the Muslim, Hindu and Jewish communities. There were a few foreign representatives from Germany, Holland and Americaland who also played a smaller role in the program as well as some special guests who were invited to be witnesses and then comment towards the end.

A TWO BY TWO BY ANY OTHER NAME…

As i said, it is hard to even give a summary of the event, but it was an incredible one to be a part of. I went to both days and the beautiful Val [tbV] accompanied me on the second day , which was great as she got to meet the Arch who is one of her heroes and get a picture taken with him. But Desmond Tutu’s presence was definitely a highlight to proceedings. From the moment he grabbed the mic, he invoked a sort of stand-up comedy routine but had the abaility toimmediately became significantly serious, often in a moment, when he needed to.

From his opening line of, “I think God is very clever sometimes'”which had everyone in stitches, to the poignantcy of,“Sometimes we do have a nostalgia for when it was simple and you knew who your enemies were”.

From the comedy of, “I don’t know how many of you watched Special Assignment on Sunday night? No? Probably because you don’t like SABC very much” to an absolute room-stopping moment of silence and recognition of the various tragedies taking place around the world, “Our God is standing there crying. (Lists places with conflict around world) Because His children are so terrible sometimes.” The Arch knew how to use silences and pauses to really allow the truth to hit home and for that truth to be allowed to impact you deeply.

And finishing off his opening address with the question and invitation of: Can we try to find a way to wipe the tears from His eyes?

From creating moments of outright mirth during the middle of serious testimonies as someone says something slightly funny or perhaps ironic and suddenly a loud high-pitched ‘Hee Hee Hee’ breaks the silence from the front row where he sat watching… to standing up to go and hug the Afrikaans pastor who has broken down in tears after sharing a hectic testimony on behalf of a church who refused to take part in the 1997 meetings and would only allow him to attend the meetings in his personal capacity… to bringing the meeting full circle by announcing towards the end, that as the man who has ‘a hotline to God’, “I can see God smiling through the tears.” Conveying a sense of absolute hope without reducing the significance of the  huge walls and immense work that still needs to be done.

And of course agreeing to pose with a yellow-and-white stuffed dolphin for this strange white dreadlocked guy who managed to corner him.

[To continue to some of the live tweets that i composed that give a glimpse into some of the ideas that were shared, click here]

 

when Desmond Tutu met No_bob [part II]

This is a continuation of the previous post which started giving an overview and summary of my participation in the  ‘Revisiting The Truth and Reconciliation Commission’s Faith Community Hearing’ which took place this week. Here are some selected highlight moments that could be captured on The Tweeterer in 140 characters of less:

FROM THE TWITTERER [Day 1 of 2]

While 140 character messages don’t capture the whole of what was experienced, hopefully they will help you to catch a bit of a glimpse:

#TRC Michael Weeder (Anglican): I have to ask, Where is God in this? And what is the work of God in this moment?

#TRC Michael Weeder (Anglican): What was abnormal then? And what of that abnormal has become normal for us today? We need to revisit.

#TRC Michael Weeder: It seems darker than yesterday. We have to drink deeply from our own wells.

#TRC: Michael Weeder: You don’t shout at people, but there comes a time when you need to. It’s time to extend this to big business.

#TRC Michael Weeder: The chains have in many ways slipped to the mind.

 

#TRC Vuyani Nyobole (methodist): We are prone to many of the sins that it is our duty to condemn.

#TRC Vuyani Nyobole: Unfinished agenda of TRC – TRC unfortunately favoured the perpetrators over the victims. Shortcoming of previous TRC

#TRC Vuyani Nyobole: We focused too much on the Truth and not enough on the Reconciliation. It was therapeutic in many ways.

#TRC Vuyani Nyobole: it wasn’t the responsibility of the government to bring reconciliation. That should have been led by faith communities.

#TRC Vuyani Nyobole: There is a responsibility on us as faith communities for critical reflection on the state of things.

#TRC Vuyani Nyobole: If there is corruption in the government, most of those people sit in our pews. It is the responsibility of the church.

 

#TRC Dion Foster (methodist): I don’t think we’re living in a post apartheid society. Law has changed. Society remains largely unchanged.

#TRC Archbishop Tutu interrupts with, “That’s why I am glad I retired when I did.” (Laughter)

#TRC Dion Foster on Culpability: We are a large religious community in this country. But we have not translated that presence into action.

 

#TRC Yasmin Sooka (panel) The presidents fund is really huge. But 19 years later, reparations have not yet happened?

 

#TRC Kevin Dowling (catholic): Where we failed was the statements didn’t necessarily move to the conversion process. The same is true today.

#TRC Kevin Dowling: Unless the privileged community go through a conversion process that affects them personally, change has not happened.

#TRC Kevin Dowling Unless you’ve held the hand that that statistic represents, you know nothing about their story.

#TRC Kevin Dowling: a transitional justice must always begin from the story and the voices of the victims.

#TRC Kevin Dowling: Retributive justice or Restorative justice – are we going to heal or punish?

#TRC Kevin Dowling: No transformation has taken place until we see economic justice and restoration.

#TRC Kevin Dowling: Restitution. Our victims, our survivors, were sold short.

#TRC Kevin Dowling: If you want peace, you have to work for justice. But very very often peace agreements to end violence sacrifice justice.

#TRC Kevin Dowling: Who will take us forward? An empowered violated disenfranchised people. We need to be in the trenches with our people.

#TRC Kevin Dowling: We cannot anymore carry on with the perception that government must do everything. Cos government can’t do everything.

#TRC Kevin Dowling: We need to forget about appearing on TV and be in the shacks, in the trenches, in the reality of our people.

#TRC Kevin Dowling just brought up the issue of immigration which is going to “exacerbate the issue of poverty.” The govt needs to address.

 

#TRC Piet Meiring (panel) we have to remember that justice and reconciliation have to go hand in hand. You can’t have one without the other.

#TRC Yasmin Sooka: Restorative justice and punitive justice. What about the forgotten one of Redistributive justice?

 

#TRC Jerry Pillay (Presbyterian): Gender justice is also an important need for the church to focus on. And ecojustice.

#TRC Jerry Pillay: The need of practical aspects of reconciliation has largely been swept under the carpet. Many of us just want “to move on”.

#TRC Jerry Pillay: Churches need to ask, “How do we actually revisit what we do in light of changing contexts?”

#TRC Jerry Pillay: The vision must come with a reminder that this is a biblical imperative. Jesus prayed that we should be one.

 

#TRC Yasmin Sooka: in reality, gender equality remains elusive. Violence against women has become normalized.

#TRC Piet Meiring: the importance of the twinning of Unity and Reconciliation is an important thing we must never forget.

 

#TRC Kobus Gerber (NGK) An event like this brings tears to our eyes. Just to experience what we were part of being done to the people.

 

#TRC Peter Grove (URC) Will we make progress if we just repeat what was said 17 years ago? I don’t think so…

#TRC Peter Grove: We live our lives between the tension of memory and expectation.

#TRC Peter Grove: People constantly rewrite the past and redefine the future.

#TRC Peter Grove: Before we can move to attempts to do certain things we need to ask ourselves how to be certain things.

#TRC Peter Grove: We cannot talk about the squatters camps and the townships. We need to meet our brothers and sisters there.

 

#TRC E G Fourie (NHK) My church made it very clear to me I’m here in my individual capacity.

#TRC E G Fourie: So in my individual capacity i want to say I’m sad that I’m here in my individual capacity.

#TRC [E G Fourie just blew this whole thing open with raw rough real tear-filled-and-causing testimony. Heavy. So good.]

#TRC E G Fourie after heavy speech about some of the race struggles within his church: This is where our church is…now.

#TRC E G Fourie: Many moons ago when i was at school we had no such thing as political correctness.

#TRC E G Fourie: kids who were mentally challenged we called specials. They were put in a special class.

#TRC E G Fourie: My church when it comes to issues of reconciliation is in a slow class.

#TRC E G Fourie:Now we call it a special needs class. My church has special needs.

#TRC EG Fourie: We have a special need for forgiveness.

#TRC [E G Fourie gets standing ovation as he breaks down and Tutu goes forward and embraces him. Real moment.]

 

#TRC Amie van Wyk: Let me explain my name. My name is Jan. My dad’s name is Jan. Our worker was Jan. The donkey’s name was Jan.

#TRC Amie van Wyk: So my mom changed my name. (Tutu in loud hysterics)

 

#TRC Daniel Andrews (AFM): We must see what is happening in society through the eyes of those who are suffering.

 

#TRC Glenda [panel]: Intergenerational trauma that adults carry that we must deal with so children don’t carry the scars on.

 

#TRC Frank Chikane (AFM) The constitution must reflect what the Lord wants us to be.

#TRC Frank Chikane: If justice calls for us to go this way we must do it, whatever the cost.

 

#TRC Tutu: God puts Himself/Herself in our hands. And we’ve messed up His reputation.

#TRC Tutu: I actually saw God smiling through the tears today. Thank you for wanting to help Me make my world a better place.

#TRC Tutu: It is up to you and you and you whether this country becomes a hell or a paradise. God doesn’t have anyone else.

 

So those are a number of the Tweets i sent out while listening on day 1 – even though you might not have been there ad even though these do not fully carry the heart of the different testimonies, there is still food for thought in here and enough to make you stop and go, ‘Wo!’ and hopefully think and reflect some more.

[To continue on to Part III and the tweets from Day 2 of the Commission, click here]