tbV and i met Lisa and Mark Scandrette and their family while over here in Americaland. They have just released a book titled ‘Free: How to spend your time and money on what matters most’ and so it felt fitting to invite them to share with us a glimpse from their story in terms of hearing some ways in which they have looked to help their children grow up well. Here is Lisa Scandrette [who has possibly one of the best t-shirts ever!]:
We moved to the heart of the Mission District, at the time a neighborhood riddled with gang violence, when our kids were 4, 3 and 1. We had a desire to raise kids who bring good to the world through the gifts and talents God has given them. Hailey, Noah and Isaiah are now 19, 18 and 16. When I look back, two things stand out as being helpful in beginning to instill a vision for doing good in our kids:
When we first moved to San Francisco, a friend asked with great concern, “How can you bring your kids to live in the neighborhood that you are living in? Shouldn’t you be looking out for their safety and well being?” I responded that I was certain that when God called us to live where we do, that he hadn’t forgotten about our kids. He had a plan for them that included the kind of parents he had placed them with. So, we took them with us. In fact, we took them with us to do lots of things. Together, we ate with homeless neighbors under the bridge and passed out groceries at a food pantry. We conspired together to show hospitality to visitors. They often all three shared a room so that we could offer a bed to a guest. They would help me clean or prepare food or draw a “Welcome” sign. They came along to workshops and watched us do the work we felt passionate about.
After many years of them being present in our projects, it has been an honor, as our kids have begun to step into projects that they are passionate about, to be able to support and help them. When the tsunami hit Japan in 2011, our daughter was in the process of organizing a senior prom. She was struck by the great need and uneasy contrasting that with what her friends might be spending on prom. She wanted to do something to help, so she decided to organize a benefit. Gathering a dozen or so of her theater friends, she planned an evening full of entertainment, rented a church space, and invited everyone she knew. Noah baked cookies, Isaiah played his violin, and Mark and I helped with food and behind the scenes details. Her event was a success, raising over $700 for tsunami relief. Even more, she was able to host an enjoyable evening for her friends that helped them also think about others with need.
Secondly, we have tried to observe our kids for hints about the work they might feel passionate about. Noah loves to explain things. In fact, one of his earliest words was the word “actually.” As he’s grown, we’ve looked for healthy ways for him to explore his passion for knowing and telling. When he was twelve, he was asked to assist teaching five and six year olds in a nature studies class. In high school, he worked at a science museum, explaining exhibits to the public and how various scientific demonstrations work. One summer, he helped kids in East Oakland document where they saw God’s beauty through photography. Our hope is that as he has had the opportunity to explore different ways of explaining and teaching, he might have a better idea of the sorts of things he is made to do and even some things that he is not made to do.
[For more information about their book titled ‘Free’, click here]
Thanks for sharing Lisa & Brett, as a parent I work through these issues daily and it’s been great to have your insights. Also, as an aside, I’m loving FREE, slowly making my way through and back through it. Matt
ah, great to hear man, Val and i are going to be running an 8 week course of Free starting in 2 weeks so looking forward to working through it with a group of people – might be something you’d consider with a group of friends that side…