to celebrate a 40 million something goal is human, to forgive is divine…

i imagine this is a much bigger post or discussion than what will fit in here but let’s get it started…

a soccer player [who was worth something like 40 million something - does it really matter when you hit 40 million whether the next word is pounds, euros or dollars?] scores a goal.

a hundred facebook statuses [stati?] read something along the lines of ‘amazing goal – so worth the money spent’

i get angry. [i know, not allowed, how absolutely elizabethan of me]

i post something about how no football player [or goal] is ever worth that amount of money. especially when hundreds of thousands [millions? does it matter once you've gone past hundreds?] of people are literally starving to death around the world

angry mob [but since we're online they can't exactly storm my castle with flaming torches, especially because of the high-tech moat system i have employed]

so discussion happens. well kinda. words are written and people [a lot of them strong christian types] strongly defend the soccer player, the club, the industry, the system.

but there is a huge disconnect. because arguments will be made [with the understood eyebrow raising condescension implied as to 'how can you even think such a thing you stupid, you.] and perhaps scripture, or scriptural ideas will be referenced and argumentative questions will be thrown [what are you saying? he should give the money back? how much of it? how much is too much?] all in defense of how much the person is worth his wages blah blah blah

what probably won’t happen is Jesus will not be quoted or referenced, because it is very hard to believe that Jesus would support the idea of a soccer player being worth millions of currency while people [specifically 'least of these' type people - Jesus' favourite type it seems] are left to starve to death or barely survive in miserable circumstances and conditions.

and what also won’t happen is the people defending overpaid soccer [and you can interchange soccer for music or entertainment or business or even church leader/speaker type - the soccer one is just a more blatant example but it is the same across the board for me] player guy won’t ever make a statement that it is okay for the poor person to suffer, starve or die. the position they take leads to that natural conclusion but they won’t ever state “i am okay with the idea that for the soccer player to get 40 million something, hundreds of people will go hungry” because i don’t believe that is a defendable argument – so play the emotion, challenge the lack of viable solution, ask the argumentative question, quote some out-of-context biblical scriptural idea, but refuse to be drawn on the fact [in my opinion] that the system is horribly wrong and broken. and disgustingly so.

the “are you suggesting?” questions are difficult because i don’t know that i have a solution – i do feel that if the player got 20 somethings instead of 40 somethings then possible the people who watch the games would be able to pay half of what they pay and so there would be a lot more money around for them to be reaching out to some of their ‘least of these’ people… but finding a solution is not my initial intention, because i believe it has to start with the acknowledgement that there is a problem. [and yes the problem is the heart of man and so on, but the one we are faced with is a problem of economic disparity that can not be denied] once we acknowledge there is a problem, that the system is broken, that it is ludicrous and shameful and wrong that the soccer player/actor/singer/politician/pastor/writer gets 40 million of something while the majority of people have to live on under 2 of something a day, then hopefully we can start working together on solutions.

at the very least, let’s stop celebrating the wrongness.

woman runs to catch baby from ten storey fall…

i thoroughly enjoy stories of hope and unselfishness and here is one of them… inspiring stuff…

why camping is not better than Jesus

aka ‘the boy who cried wolfpocalypse’

as i sat in theatresports [improv comedy group i belong to] class last nite and people were joking about the whole rapture thing or lack of thing, it was a little frustrating to see how christians [to be seriously not confused with Christ-followers though] had once again managed to give the group a bad name… a laugh-out-loud point-and-mock bad name…

but this time it was a truly ridiculous premise – Harold Camping, a California preacher and registered loony toon claimed that the rapture would occur May 21, 2011 and that the world would be obliterated by a fireball October 21 [he is now claiming that he made a mistake - again, as he had predicted the end of the world in 1994 - and that the correct date is October 21 for the rapture - however he also says that he won't give away any of his possessions before October 21] and was left hiding out in a motel with his wife when nothing happened…

it’s not so much that he ‘just made a mistake’ – he was never even in the same playing fields as someone who could have possibly gotten it right…

in Matthew 24.36 Jesus says this, “No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father.”

so basically Jesus is saying that even He doesn’t know when the end is going to happen [difficult one maybe with our Jesus is God understanding, maybe He was simply talking about while He was living on earth as a human] and so no one else will. as in the days of Noah people will be going about their stuff – eating, drinking, watching bad movies – and then suddenly Boom, or maybe Whoosh!

what makes the whole thing a lot worse is that the big kook had a bunch of little kooks:

“Follower Jeff Hopkins also spent a good deal of his own retirement savings on gas money to power his car so people would see its ominous lighted sign showcasing Camping’s May 21 warning. As the appointed day drew nearer, Hopkins started making the 100-mile round trip from Long Island to New York City twice a day, spending at least $15 on gas each trip.

“I’ve been mocked and scoffed and cursed at and I’ve been through a lot with this lighted sign on top of my car,” said Hopkins, 52, a former television producer who lives in Great River, NY. “I was doing what I’ve been instructed to do through the Bible, but now I’ve been stymied. It’s like getting slapped in the face.” [http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_apocalypse_saturday]

The only problem with saying “I was doing what I’ve been instructed to do through the Bible” is that Jeff clearly missed the part of the Bible that said ‘what you are doing is futile because no one knows the day or the hour’ and this whole story demonstrates once again that when the bible is misused or abused it can lead to good people being manipulated to do stupid things.

and the danger of ONLY receiving your feeding from someone else… if you had only just read the gospels Jeff, you would have clearly and obviously known that you were following the wrong guy… a large percentage of the church has adopted the lazy culture of being spoonfed from the front [as opposed to reading and studying and knowing scripture for yourself, at the same time as receiving scripture from others who have studied it and speak it well] and because you don’t read the Bible for yourself you have to believe whatever gets dished out to you and to misquote Helen Zille completely, “you get the biblical teaching you deserve.”

as a Christ-follower, there is one aspect of this story that we can take seriously. no, we will never know the exact day or hour, but in terms of urgency, in terms of living the life-to-the-full that Jesus spoke of, in terms of making an impact on the world and living in obedience to God and what the Bible actually says, we should live each day as if we suspect the rapture could happen today. Plan as if you’re going to live 1000 years but live as if you’re going to die tomorrow, i think someone said. Something like that.

love God, love people, take care of those in need, leave the billboarding to someone else…

the royal wedding preach

my good friend patrick of cordery sent me a link to the preach at the wedding of william and kate yesterday which i sadly missed due to not wanting to watch it… but i’m really glad he did cos the words of this are phenomenal and really worth checking out or going and taking a read through again in case you were watching but a bit too caught up by lady gaga’s hat…

this is how it began:

“Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire.” So said St Catherine of Siena whose festival day it is today. Marriage is intended to be a way in which man and woman help each other to become what God meant each one to be, their deepest and truest selves.”

and that is a flippin incredible introduction to marriage…

this was in the middle:

“William and Catherine, you have chosen to be married in the sight of a generous God who so loved the world that he gave himself to us in the person of Jesus Christ. And in the Spirit of this generous God, husband and wife are to give themselves to each another.”

and this is the prayer that ended it:

“God our Father, we thank you for our families; for the love that we share and for the joy of our marriage. In the busyness of each day keep our eyes fixed on what is real and important in life and help us to be generous with our time and love and energy. Strengthened by our union help us to serve and comfort those who suffer. We ask this in the Spirit of Jesus Christ. Amen.”

so click here if you want to read the words or else you could click here, but i can guarantee you really don’t want to be clicking here so seriously, don’t do it, i warned you.

this is the part that highlights for me the exciting worthy-of-celebration parts of everything that made up yesterday – that there was a marriage union between two people who love each other and may all those who were obsessed with the day for everything it did for themselves, continue to be as interested in praying for and cheerleading this couple in their marriage and hoping for the absolute best for both of them.

the royal pita wedding

where ‘p’ is for ‘pain’

there are three kinds of people in the world – those who are obsessed with the royal wedding happening in the uk today between william and kate and those who aren’t [the third group being those fortunate enough to have no clue that it is happening, who i assume are the poor and marginalised because if you have a tv or computer you probably cannot avoid having had it thrust before your face numerously]

and if it’s you’re thing and you’re obsessed with it then good for you, well maybe not if you’re obsessed cos then you should go seek help, but if you’re interested and want to watch and stuff, you have my blessing, just do it in the other room, please… i, however, fit into the second category…

people in britain being obsessed i can understand a little bit, but south africans taking the day off work to have scone and champagne parties a lot less so… but again, if that’s your thing and you’re going to enjoy it, enjoy it large…

but for all those who don’t and aren’t, here is a clip worth visiting as the one kind of royalty the uk has brought us which i have appreciated – it’s one of my favourite scenes from monty python’s ‘the quest for the holy grail’ and especially significant this year for me contains the line, “I’m 37, I’m not old” so check it out.

then, if you finished that and are still trying to avoid hearing about which way they swirled the cream on the royal scones [not a metaphor] you can take a look at this one which contains my favourite line of the movie and maybe of all time, even though it has nothing to do with royalty…

“she turned me into a newt.”
[awkward silence]
“i got better.”

when humour crosses the line it’s not a joke…

Bloomberg Businessweek is one of the publications that carries the story of comedian Gilbert Gottfriend [probly don't recognise the name but if you're old you would probly recognise him from the 'The Problem Child' movies with John Ritter as well as being the voice of Iago from the Aladdin movies] who was fired this week after Tweeting inappropriate jokes about the Japanese crisis…

‘March 14 (Bloomberg) — Aflac Inc., the biggest seller of supplemental insurance, fired comedian Gilbert Gottfried, the voice of its duck mascot in the U.S., after comments he made about tsunami victims in Japan, the firm’s biggest market.

“Gilbert’s recent comments about the crisis in Japan were lacking in humor and certainly do not represent the thoughts and feelings of anyone at Aflac,” said Michael Zuna, senior vice president and chief marketing officer, in a statement today from the Columbus, Georgia-based insurer.‘

[rest of the article here]

which i think is great! earlier this year my buddy Dunc gifted me and tbV with tickets to go and watch Jeff Dunham [the 'Achmed the dead terrorist' ventriloquist comedian] who we used to really enjoy. we have all his dvds and were really looking forward to the show at Grand West. If it had been easier to walk out than the place where we were seated i think i would have. Jeff spent most of the show making bitter biting comments about his ex-wife. Very very awkward and almost completely not funny, just a little bit freaky. When he mentioned that the divorce happened two years previously i could not believe it cos the way he was speaking it sounded like it had just happened. It was just completely horrible and i lost a lot of respect for him that nite.

then a good mate of ours gave us a Ricky Gervais standup comedy video which was very edgy and hectic in terms of content [altho very funny for the most part] but near the end he went for a routine that basically was hitting the topic of child abuse and as much as a bunch of the stuff he’d done before was close to the line, it just suddenly crossed into a place of JUST DON’T GO THERE!

and that is the point of this blog. there is a line. i’m sure it looks different to different people, but there are some things you really should never joke about. ever. an international crisis that has just seen thousands of people die and hundreds of thousands lose everything is one of those things. so is child abuse. and rape. and the holocaust. and i’m sure a whole lot more. some things are just not worth the laugh.

which is why in this ‘freedom of speech’ [is it still freedom when your freedom starts encroaching on another persons?] society we live in, it was refreshing to see Aflac Inc. show some integrity and immediacy in terms of firing Gottfried and hopefully sending out a message that there are some things that will not be tolerated, even in comedy.

at the other end of the spectrum, doing a lot less harm, except maybe to himself, we have charlie sheen whose latest warlock plan is to marry a tree. according to www.doorstepnews.com, he said: “I’m going to marry a tree because the other type of marriage didn’t work so I’m going to marry a tree.” [http://doorstepnews.com/charlie-sheen-might-as-well-just-marry-a-tree]

if u have cats, you could be missing out on a gold mine

if you’re not feeding them coffee beans and then sifting through their poo for the digested beans and making high quality expensive coffee, that is…

i kid you not – check this out…

and have not love, i am a clanging Bell?

i am completely over the whole rob bell public bashing, public defending, long back-and-forth status comments thing and so i am hoping this will be my last post on the matter, but i think this is a valid point [and the title which i thort of as i came in here to write is pretty relevant as well]

i recently read this comment at the end of another long rob bell – is he a universalist or isn’t he back-and-forth um… let’s be nice and say ‘conversation’ :

“Game set and match, Jonathan. Well put.”

and responded with this:

“see when you start using “i won the tennis match” language it really emphasises the fact that for so many people this rob bell crap [cos let's be honest] has become a lot less about standing up for God’s Truth and become a lot more about being right… or having the appearance of being right.”

and that is sadly what it feels like it has become for a lot of people – whereas, right or wrong, the bible is very strong about the fact that Rob Bell is our neighbour and our response needs to be that of love, and 1 Corinthians 13 lists a whole bunch of amazing things we can do and achieve but if there is no love, it means nothing, it achieves nothing, it counts for nothing.

and something about us being the clanging bell… a lot of noise, but no point.

yes, if his theology is publically bad it does need to be dealt with (publically i think, the Matthew passage about ‘if your brother sins against you’ doesn’t apply here because it is not a brother sinning against you – note how Jesus responds publically to bad theology a lot) but it does need to be done in love and the end point hope is that he will always be restored…

i’m not sure how much of that is evident in “Farewell Rob Bell” and various other sentiments that have been expressed this last week.

how bout we all just wait til we can read the book now? [excepting for those of you who are running away completely from the book because, um i can't remember why, but something]

go to hell ha ha ha

just watching the rob bell furore that has swept up has once again brought something to the fore which i think needs comment and some thort by people who claim to be Jesus-followers…

one of the accusations that has been made against rob bell is that he is a universalist which as i understand it is someone who believes that everyone is going to end up in heaven, and by definition no one ends up in hell.

i don’t know if rob bell is a universalist. people have seemed to infer that from the questions he asks in the promo video for his latest book: ‘Love Wins: A Book About Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived.’ But according to the one article i read, it says, “after all, on page 72 he actually states, “Do I believe in a literal hell? Of course.” [really good article response to the rob bell stuff here]

but that is not my concern. if he believes that then i definitely would take a stand against the belief because i think the Bible is largely clear on that matter and a lot of Jesus’ teaching and parables seem to deal with who will make it and who won’t.

what concerns me is how amped so many christians seem to be to point people towards hell. my friend Ant Martin mentioned to me how many people have responded to the Rob Bell video by making statements like “reality check, Ghandi’s in hell..” i mean, firstly spell his name right, it’s Gandhi… the question Rob Bell asks in his video is, “Gandhi’s in hell? Really? You know that for sure?” and people divebombed him…

as far as i understand it, it is through faith in Jesus Christ that we receive forgiveness of our sins and are made righteous to be able to live eternally with God (which does begin now) – the thief on the cross next to Jesus receives salvation even though he has done nothing in his life to deserve it, but he acknowledges who Jesus is and Jesus welcomes him to paradise. i don’t know if Gandhi turned to Jesus for forgiveness. But i don’t know that he didn’t. What i do know is that Gandhi loved Jesus and wasdn’t so fond of His followers who didn’t seem to display the same kind of life that Jesus spoke about and lived. But i don’t know the state of Gandhi’s heart at the time of his death and whether or not he was in relationship with God and so for people to say he is definitely in hell seems like a foolish, immature, arrogant and presumptious statement to make [unless you have some evidence i don't]

and as i said it concerns me greatly that people claiming to be Christ followers are almost excited to point out that someone is going to hell – whether it’s Gandhi or homosexuals or abortion clinic owners or Saddam Hussein or Hitler, it doesn’t matter – hell is a place that was designed for the devil and his angels [Matthew 25.41] and it is always a complete tragedy when any person ends up there.

if it is true that Gandhi is headed towards hell, that should break us.

what is the greatest commandment? to love the Lord your God with all of your heart, soul and strength and to love your neighbour as yourself. Gandhi is my neighbour [Luke 10.25-37] and my attitude to him has to be one of love. and to anyone else, no matter who they are or what they have done.

maybe if we, as Jesus followers, had a better response to people heading towards hell, we would live differently while they are alive, and in our space, and living next door to us, and help direct them towards a Jesus-filled eternity which starts right now – a life that is symbolised by the fruit of the spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control) and by loving God and loving people and looking after those in need.

and be absolutely shattered every single time someone dies without coming into a saving relationship with Jesus Christ.

[and spending less time involved in random online judgemental railings against what someone might be saying in some book we haven't and probably aren't going to read because of what we thort they might have said in their promotional video and book blurb]

for whom the (rob) bell tolls

years ago a book called ‘Velvet Elvis’ came out by this new kid on the block, rob bell, and everyone was reading it and telling me it was the greatest book ever and blah blah blah… i eventually got hold of it [was going thru my phase of taking my time to rush to trending books] and read it and didn’t particularly dig it all that much – it was ok and there were some moments but it didn’t really grab me…

then i heard Rob Bell was quite closely linked to brian mclaren and i read one of his books and didn’t dig it much at all and heard some stuff about him and his views on hell and some other stuff and really didn’t like what i heard and so kinda wrote him off a bit and included mister bell in that…

but then i saw a Nooma video or two and i got hold of his follow up book ‘Sex God’ which i really did enjoy and especially the chapter on women and submission [which i still hold today is one of the best explanations and understandings of it and my beautiful wife Val who was totally unamped with that bit in the Bible really dug what rob bell had to say and 'got' it a lot more] and i watched two of his movie preaches – ‘The Gods aren’t angry’ and ‘Everything is Spiritual’ and really enjoyed those and so gradually i have become a lot more open to rob bell’s stuff and enjoy a lot of what he has to say.

so i woke up this morning to find that he is trending and for all the wrong reasons. he has a new book coming out [note not out yet, so yes people are writing hardcore opinions about a book they for the most part haven't read!] called ‘Love Wins: Heaven, Hell, and the Fate of Every Person Who Ever Lived’ and it comes with a promotional video which you can watch here which seems to be gathering a storm of controversiality and comment from christians the world over [slash americaland]

i haven’t read the book yet [as haven't most of the people who are making definitive statements on why the book is so evil] but i enjnoyed the video and completely get why it would make people concerned about what Rob might say in the book, but still read the book before making definitive statements. Apparently John Piper’s response was a ‘Farewell Rob Bell’ Tweet with a link to the article, whereas Josh Harris [well-known author of "I kissed reading books before i commented on them goodbye"] also had some words to say [for some reason the link is not working or loading on my computer but try www.joshharris.com and see if it works for you]

another quite negative review is by a guy called Justin Taylor (no, not our Justin Taylor) which you can read here

and then finally i found a more positive review from someone who had actually read the book [as a book seller they got an advance copy] and their thorts you can find here.

i think the bottom line is that sometimes being well-meaning is not enuff – i remember a few years ago when a pastor in the eastern cape sent emails to a bunch of people warning them about some local pastors who had read and preached positive stuff about ‘the Shack’ another controversial’ish book that had come out – turns out he had not read it either but was a self-proclaimed expert on its content [which, having read the book and then his email rant i can tell he was completely not except perhaps in the area of missing-the-pointness]

so what is the bottom line? looks like rob bell got some great advertising for his new book and it’s something i will definitely look out for – but the bottom line is a little gem hidden in thessalonians which reminds us to ‘test the spirits. hold on to the good. avoid every kind of evil’ [1 thessalonians 5.21] – whether it’s rob bell or me or your pastor or the book you’re reading or sermon you’re downloading, we are urged to test what it says against the bible and if it holds up, the embrace it and if it doesn’t, then discard it… do the same with this one… but the whole public rob-bashing that is going on [in the name of love, hm] may be just another example of christians publically slating christians while non-christians are sitting back and watching and asking, “so you’re wanting us to join this party?”

go team.